


Beyond Memories

by Talon88



Category: Star Wars Legends - All Media Types
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-28
Updated: 2019-01-28
Packaged: 2019-10-18 09:47:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 43,377
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17578550
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Talon88/pseuds/Talon88
Summary: I believe this the first long story I ever wrote. I started it in 2006, but life got messy for me and I put this fanfic aside.  In 2011, I got around to finishing the story.  Hopefully, I got better at writing over the years.This takes place before Vision of the Future.  It is a Luke/Mara love story involving Mara getting amnesia and forgetting all about her past, the last command, or her rocky relationship with Luke.  Luke and Mara get a do-over at romance, but nothing can be easy with those two kids.





	1. Chapter 1

Luke rolled over to his side and glanced at his chrono. The incessant buzzing of Luke's com-unit had pulled the Jedi out of a deep sleep.

"Who's calling me at this time in the morning?" Luke mumbled to himself.

He momentarily considered not answering the call, but he immediately felt guilty. He was a Jedi, and part of being a Jedi meant he had responsibilities and obligations that were unavoidable. Dragging himself out of bed, he wrapped a sheet around his body and stumbled over to his communication unit.

Tapping the controls, he really hoped it was not another mission. He had just returned from a very unpleasant jaunt to Nal Hutta and he looked forward to some alone time on Coruscant to visit his sister and her family.

"Skywalker here," he said groggily.

"Luke." a familiar voice rang out. His face immediately brightened upon seeing Leia, that is until he noticed the worry etched on his sister's face.

Luke reached out with the Force and felt her distress. "What's wrong, Leia?"

"I just woke up Luke and I realized Han never returned home last night," Leia's voice cracked with emotion and she momentarily paused to collect herself. "He and Lando took off last night to the lower levels of Coruscant to do some gambling. He told me not to wait up for him… but he should be home by now Luke. I have been trying to get a hold of him or Lando for the last hour, but they won't answer their comlinks."

"Don't worry Leia," Luke reassured his sister. "They probably drank a little too much and are sleeping it off in the corner booth of some pub. Do you have any idea which club they went to?"

Leia shook her head. "No Luke. I don't even think they had any particular place in mind when they left."

"It'll be okay, Leia," he said soothingly, as well as sending comfort to her through the Force, "I'll find them. Han took me to a couple of his favorite gambling establishments a couple years back. I think I can locate them again. I'll go check them out and get back to you in a couple hours."

Leia smiled weakly. "Thank you, Luke."

Luke was ready to sign off, but hesitated. "Leia, there hasn't been any threats to Han's life lately, has there? Anything that I should know about?"

Leia shook her head, the tears flowing freely now. "No, none. But somebody could go after him to get to me, or even you. I just have this bad feeling Luke, I am really worried about him."

"I am too, but don't worry. I'll bring him back home." With that he signed off and leaned back in his chair with a sigh. Why was it that Han always managed to get himself into trouble?

_Funny, Han would say the same about me._

Luke disappeared into his fresher and after a quick shower got dressed. He then went to his computer and pulled up a few maps of Corsucant's gaming and entertainment district. The last thing he needed to do before he left was cancel his early morning lightsaber practice with Mara Jade.

He looked at his chrono, it was almost an hour before their morning meeting. "I hope she is awake," Luke said to himself as he made the call. After allowing the com-unit to signal a half dozen times, Luke decided that she must still be asleep. He was about to disconnect the call and leave a voice recording when a somewhat disheveled redhead appeared on his screen.

"Skywalker!" Mara said with a slightly annoyed voice, "It figures it would be you interrupting my shower!"

Luke did not reply. He instead starred mesmerize at the image before him. Mara was leaning over her desk glowering into the com-unit holocam. It appeared to Luke that the only thing maintaining her modesty was a white towel which she clutched tightly around her torso. Mara's long, and very wet, red-gold hair hung limply around her shoulders. Beads of water dripped from her face and along the curve of her neck before they disappeared between the cleavage of her breasts safely hidden from view but outlined nicely beneath her thin bath towel.

 _‘Had she always been this beautiful?’_ Luke thought, completely stunned—his brother-in-law's disappearance momentarily forgotten.

"Luke. Luke! Coruscant to Luke, do you read me." Mara said with a bemused look on her face as she waved her hand in front of the camera to catch the Jedi's attention.

A surge of embarrassment ran through Luke as he suddenly realized he was starring mutely at the women. "I am, uh, I am sorry to bother you Mara." the words fumbled out of his mouth as his brain began to reengage. "I have to cancel our lightsaber practice this morning. Han and Lando have came up missing somewhere in the Coruscant lower levels and I am going to look for them."

"Han and Lando are missing?" Mara repeated in alarm.

Luke could see anxiety and apprehension permeate her face. He was surprised at Mara's apparent intense concern for his missing friends.

 _'Is she concerned for Han or Lando?'_ he thought.

Luke had heard the rumors about a possible relationship between Mara and Lando, but he always dismissed those rumors and assumed any relationship was business related. The Jedi was surprised to realize he didn't like the thought of the philandering former Baron Administrator of Cloud City being with Mara. Luke didn't know why it bothered him so much, but it probably had to do with that fact that Mara was his friend, and Lando was one ladies man he wouldn't wish on any woman.

"Don't worry Mara, they are probably just passed out drunk," Luke assured her. "I am going down to the old gambling district to look for them."

"Not without me you are not!" She exclaimed sharply. Luke was now totally taken aback by the determination in her voice. Through their tentative Force-bond he could actually feel the distress and concern emanating off of Mara. Luke felt his chest tighten as a disheartening feeling washed over him.

_'I guess those rumors aren't false.'_

Luke tried to push away those thoughts. Han and Lando may be in danger and that took precedence over any of his petty concerns. "I was just about to leave now, how about meeting me at Lanthrym's Palace. Do you know the place?" Luke asked.

"Yes, see you there in about thirty?" Mara asked.

"Yeah, that should give me enough time to get down there… oh and Mara…" Luke said then hesitated.

She gave him a confused look, "What?"

"You may want to dress a little more formally." Luke said with a wink and smile he borrowed from his brother-in-law.

Mara glanced down at the towel that was straining to cover her various curves. She blushed as she must have realized that the image transmitted revealed more than just a headshot. "Shut up and get going!" the redhead snarled and then cut the connection.

Luke laughed and then got up to begin his impromptu mission.

.

.

Mara cut the comm connection with Luke and sighed as she collapsed down onto her chair. She hoped her concern for the Jedi was not readily apparent.

She had her shields up and tried to play nonchalant when Skywalker called her, but when he mentioned Solo and Calrissian pieces of last night's nightmare came flooding back to her. Even now she could only remember fleeting images of Han, Luke and Calrissian, then a confusing blur of activity. All of which culminated in a horrible feeling of dread and the image of Luke in trouble followed by screaming. She recognized the sound came from Luke and it was a shout of utter despair that reverberated through her head long after the dream shocked her awake, leaving her in a cold sweat.

Mara shook her head slowly. What she saw last night might have simply been a bad dream and not a vision of the future. But if it was a Force vision, she hoped her presence could halt any impending tragedy.

"The future is always in motion," she said to herself apprehensively as she went to get dressed.


	2. Chapter 2

The two of them located Han and Lando in the fifth pub they investigated. Just like Luke predicted, the two former smugglers were passed out and sleeping off a night of drinking, sprawled across the padded bench seats of a dark corner booth.

"Han," Luke said quietly as he nudged his old friend's shoulder. The only response that garnered was a grumbled groan. "Han!" Luke said louder giving his friend a harder shake.

Han gingerly opened his bloodshot eyes. He looked the worse for wear with dark stubble on his chin and his hair sticking up in all directions. What was the worse part was that he smelled like somebody had dropped an entire bottle of Corellian whiskey down his shirt.

"Whaaa?" Han mumbled.

"Han it's morning," Luke explained patiently. "You have been at this pub all night and Leia has been worried sick."

"Shavit!" Han's eyes flew open wide as he swore. He jerked himself into a sitting position, immediately regretting his swift action. Grabbing his head he groaned, "Ohhhhh… I am never, ever going to drink again."

"Don't make any promises you don't intend to keep, Han." Luke admonished his friend while trying to stifle his laughter. He helped Han get to his feet and said, "Mara, see if you can get Lando awake, will you? I am going to take Han to the refresher and splash some water on his face. Then we can call Leia."

"I'm on it." Mara moved towards the sleeping gambler.

Luke made his way to the refresher with Han, trying to hold back a grin when he heard Lando's unhappy groan from a not so gentle wake-up call.

.

.

Mara gave Lando a sharp nudge on his shoulder. "Rise and shine, Calrissian."

Lando just grunted and rolled over onto his side pulling his purple cape up over his face. "Go away," he mumbled almost incoherently.

"Lando, get up!" Mara barked at him a bit impatiently. She pulled the cape off of his face and grabbed him by his earlobe, pulling him up into a sitting position.

"Owww…that hurts!" Calrissian yelped as he tried to pull Mara's hand away from his ear. Once he was sitting upright, Mara released him and then rocked back on her heels, folding her arms across her chest while giving the hungover man a disapproving look.

Lando rubbed his eyes and when the identity of the woman standing before him finally registered in his alcohol muddled brain he smiled brightly. "Mara my Dear, I always dreamed of the day when I would wake up to your beautiful face."

Mara snorted and rolled her eyes. "Dream on Calrissian. If it didn't happen when we had to pretend we were a couple for that Force-forsaken mission, it sure isn't going to happen now," she said as she finally got a good look at her old business partner. "You are a mess, what in the world did you and Solo do last night?"

Lando groaned and buried his head in his hands. "Well we were not doing very well at the Sabacc tables so we decided to have a few drinks. Some people recognized us and were buying us shots. Then we had a little contest to see if we could get in the _Rancor Red Five Mug Club._ "

Mara shook her head in disbelief. _Rancor Red_ was the name of the most potent alcoholic drink made. It was a mixture of five different distilled spirits and a red hard cider. She also knew that some bartenders were known to put a dash of spice into the mixture. One of those drinks would knock a grown man out. It was believed that five would intoxicate a full-grown Rancor… that is if anybody could convince a Rancor to drink the vile concoction in the first place.

"How many did you and Solo drink, Calrissian?"

"Three," Lando admitted groggily.

Mara sighed gratefully; at least she wouldn't have to get their stomachs pumped.

"Each," Lando added.

"You and Solo had three each!" She shook her head in disbelief. "I cannot believe you two are still alive. Come on lets get you home and in bed."

As she pulled Lando onto his feet, the dashing dark-skinned man swayed and stumbled forward falling into Mara's arms. She had to use the Force to help her prop up the inebriated gambler. Lando wrapped his arms around Mara and rested his head on her shoulder.

"Get me home and in bed…I thought you would never ask," he whispered into her ear. He was attempting to be charming, but the effect was marred when he let out a warm belch. "Ohh, I don't feel well."

"I don't imagine you do, Calrissian," she waved her hand in front of her face to rid herself of the vile smell the burp emitted. She rotated so that Lando was now standing to her side. Slipping her arm around his waist, she started moving him toward the door.

Mara looked up and saw Luke standing outside the men's 'fresher door. He gave her an odd look, one she didn't recognize. She was going to send out a Force probe to get a feel of his emotions, but Lando stumbled and it took all of her concentration to stop him from falling on his face. She practically had to drag him over to where Luke and Han stood.

"I called a Taxi speeder. It should be here in a few minutes," Luke told Mara. "Leia said she would take care of them."

Mara gave Luke a knowing look. "I bet she will. I'd hate to be a hung over Corellian smuggler today."

Han leaned heavily against the pub wall and groaned. "Leia is going to kill us," he said as he gave a pained look at Lando.

"Us?" Lando slurred. "Why do I have to go home with Solo? I don't want to face Leia!"

"Because Lando," Luke said, "after what Han told me you two drank I think you should be monitored until you two sober up. I hate to think you had alcohol or spice poisoning and I just sent you home alone."

"Well, I don't have to be alone," Calrissian said with a smirk as he tightened his grip around Mara's shoulder. Lando turned and gave the woman a brilliant smile. "Mara can come back to my ship and nurse me back to health."

Mara's eyes narrowed and her mouth drew into a thin line. She then swiftly let go of the Entrepreneur's waist and slapped him on the backside of his head. Lando howled and he released Mara's shoulders to cradle his aching head in his hands.

"That's not funny Mara," he cried, "You know I have a hangover."

"Yes, and that is exactly why I did it," Mara confessed. "You should know better than to be play drinking games."

At that moment the bartender entered the back room. "Your cab's here," the brawny alien said with a thick Basic accent.

"Thanks," Luke said as he hoisted Han's arm over his shoulder and took a firm grip around his brother-in-law's waist. "Come on Han, time to go home. Leia is waiting for you."

Mara took Lando by the arm and roughly guided him toward the door.

.

.

A few minutes later the two inebriated former smugglers were in a speeder on their way to the Imperial Palace Apartments.

"Well, that turned out alright," Luke said cheerfully.

Luke watched Mara straightened her shirt. She seemed to have disliked being manhandled by a drunken Calrissian. Once she was done she looked up at him and smiled. "For us you mean? I would hate to be them."

Luke laughed softly as they started walking down the street toward Luke's parked speeder. He stole a glance at the woman strolling next to him. Luke had been secretly relieved that Mara did not take up Lando's offer to accompany him to his ship. If they had been dating it looked like they were no longer a couple now, at least that is what Luke hoped. He had to admit when he exited the 'fresher and saw Lando hugging Mara a surge of jealously coursed through him.

He chided himself. Mara was just a friend, so why should he feel jealous whether or not she's dating another man? Maybe it was because who the man was? Mara had so much of her life taken from her already; she didn't need to hook up with a womanizer that would eventually break her heart.

The rumbling of his stomach interrupted Luke's thoughts. It was late morning and he was getting hungry. He didn't have a chance earlier to have breakfast before he rushed out to search for Han and Lando.

"Mara would you like to join me for an early lunch?" he asked hesitantly.

Mara turned and smiled, again. "Sure Skywalker, are you buying?"

Luke chuckled. "Sure. Do you have any place you would like to eat? Or would you rather come to my place and I will cook up something?"

Mara looked as if she was going to make one of her classic snide remarks about Luke's cooking when her body stiffened. Luke's Force senses also flared and both grasped their unlit sabers and scanned the area for danger.

"Down!" Mara screamed as she pushed Luke to the sidewalk.

A small airspeeder dove down on their position, the driver hunched over the controls either dead or unconscious. Luke could feel the wind created by the fast moving vehicle wash over him as he barely avoided the oncoming transport. There was a horrific explosion as the vehicle hit the building behind them.

Luke blinked as he tried to clear his eyes from the smoke generated from the crash. He heard someone groan and terror clutched his chest as he recognized the voice. "Mara!" Luke screamed trying to locate his friend through the smoke. Finally he saw Mara a few yards from him on the walkway. "Oh no!" Luke cried out as he quickly made his way over to his friend. "Mara, are you alright?"

Luke rolled her over and immediately saw the large gash on her forehead. It didn't look too deep but it was bleeding profusely. With nothing else to aid him, Luke pulled his shirt off and balled it up, pressing it against her wound to try to stop the bleeding. Luke reached out with the Force in an effort to help heal the laceration. Mara's Force signature burned bright and Luke was relieved that she did not appear to be mortally wounded.

He held his makeshift bandage with one hand and with the other dug out his comlink out of his pants pocket. He activated the emergency channel, called in the accident and requested a medevac shuttle.

People were running around them in panic, many of them screaming, but Luke barely registered their existence. All he could focus on was the injured woman in front of him. He was fairly certain now that the speeder had hit her as it flew overhead. If Mara hadn't pushed him out of the way he surely would have been decapitated since he was about half a head taller than she was. Tears started to well up in his eyes as he realized that Mara had saved his life and because of it she was terribly injured.

The Force flowed from Luke to Mara as he desperately tried to stop the bleeding and repair her wound. Luke felt something strange. It was like Mara's Force signature was becoming jumbled. Her eyes fluttered open for a moment as she stared into Luke's face.

"Luke?" she said softly, then her eyes rolled back and she began to shake uncontrollably.

"Mara!" Luke panicked as his friend had a violent seizure. "Mara!" he cried. "Don't do this!"

He frantically tried to hold down his friend as she shook and spasmed. He wished Cilghal were here, the Jedi healer would know what to do. Luke cursed his lack of Force healing knowledge.

He was greatly relieved when the medic droids finally arrived and gave Mara a hypospray to sedate her. They loaded her and another injured bystander into the Ambulance and whisked them to the Corsucant Emergency Medical facility.

Luke ran to his speeder and took off after the emergency vehicle. He hoped Mara would be all right. He didn't know what he would do if he lost her.


	3. Chapter 3

Luke was waiting in the Medical facility waiting room when his sister arrived.

"Luke, is Mara okay?" Leia asked anxiously as she hugged her brother.

"I don't know yet," Luke said as he gently disengaged from his sister's embrace and began pacing nervously around the room. "I was told they'd let me know when they had her stabilized."

"You told me there was a speeder accident over the comm, but what happened exactly?"

Luke stopped his pacing and sat down. He covered his eyes with a hand for a moment and then looked up at his sister. "We had just put Han and Lando into a taxi and were heading back to my speeder when we both sensed danger. We were looking for the source when Mara pushed me to the ground. I then heard a huge crash and an explosion. I looked over and Mara was bleeding."

Luke hesitated and drew in a deep breath. Letting it out slowly, he continued. "I was told the airspeeder driver had a heart attack while driving. That's probably why we didn't sense the danger until the last second. There was no ill will, it wasn't somebody intending to harm us… it was simply an accident. Unfortunately, it looks like the speeder hit Mara on the way down."

"Luke, I am sure Mara will be alright," Leia assured him as she sat down next to him and put a comforting arm around his shoulder.

"She saved my life… again," his voice was hoarse and choked with emotion as Luke buried his head in his hands. "She one of my best friends, Leia, she means so much to me. I don't know what I would do if I lost her."

Leia gave him a gentle hug. "Luke, I am sure she will be fine. We have the best medical doctors in the galaxy working here. Don't worry."

Luke nodded his head as he raked his hand through his hair nervously.

"Master Skywalker?" A middle aged human male sporting a white medical smock called out from the waiting room door.

Luke stood up quickly. "Yes."

"I am Dr. Defel, Miss Jade's physician." He announce as he stepped forward and shook the Jedi's hand. "You may see her now. Please follow me."

Luke and Leia followed the doctor down the hall into a private room. Mara was lying unconscious on the lone bed. Her forehead was bandaged and she had an intravenous line hooked to one arm.

Luke came to Mara's side and gently placed his hand on hers. He looked up at the doctor with apprehension. "Will she be okay?"

"She will be fine Master Skywalker," the doctor said with a smile. Luke and Leia both let out a sigh of relief. "However, she will have to stay here for a few days while we monitor her condition. She received a tremendous blow to her head. There was some swelling of the brain and some minor damage to the temporal and frontal lobe, but in the next couple days we will perform neural repairs."

The twins nodded. This wasn't the first time Mara had received brain trauma and had to have her neural paths worked on.

"What concerns us," the doctor continued, "is the Grand Mal seizure she experienced at the accident site and when she arrived in the Emergency room. They are not uncommon when a person experiences head trauma, but it complicates matters."

"How so?" Luke asked.

"Well, without the seizures she would be released on her own recognizance after the neural repair is complete in a couple days, but with the seizures we would want to monitor her condition for a few months… between three and six months actually. We will have her on a neuroleptic medication to prevent any more seizures."

"Neuroleptic?" Leia asked.

"Sorry, it's an anti-seizure medication," the doctor explained. "We will have her on a full dose for at least a month and then start to wean her slowly from the medication. As I said it may take between three to six months depending on how she responds to the medication and if there is a reoccurrence of seizure activity."

"Will she have to remain in the hospital the entire time?" Luke hoped not, for the doctor's sake. Mara didn't like hospitals, or med centers, or anything of the kind.

"No, but she will have to be monitored in case she has another seizure. If that occurs, there is an emergency hypospray that must be administered and a medevac called. This can be done by a medical droid or a family member." The doctor went to the end of Mara's bed and picked up her chart. "I didn't see a next-of-kin listed in her paperwork. Does Miss Jade have parents, siblings, husband or boyfriend that can care for her during this time?"

Luke shook his head. "No, as far as we know she has no family. She's not married and she's not dating anybody," Luke hesitated, "at least I don't thinks so."

"Well," the doctor tapped his stylus against Mara's chart thoughtfully, "I can write up paperwork assigning her a guardian for medical purposes. This will allow the person to pick up prescriptions and for me to discuss private medical information with them. Do you know anybody who would take on this responsibility?"

"She can stay with me," Leia volunteered.

"No," Luke said quickly. "No, Mara is in this condition because she was saving me. I want to take care of her. She can stay in my guest bedroom. I'll get Cilghal to send me one of her spare medical droids and I can also have Artoo keep an eye on her when I am not around."

"Are you sure?" Leia asked.

"Yes," Luke nodded resolutely, "like I said, she saved my life, this is my responsibility. Besides, you already have three children and Han to keep an eye on."

"Okay, as long as Mara is alright with that," Leia finally conceded.

"Very well," the doctor said as he returned the chart to the holder at the end of Mara's bed. "Miss Jade will remain under sedation until the completion of her neural repairs, which should be about two days. If you follow me Master Skywalker I will give you the guardianship paperwork you will need to fill out and return to my office."

"Doctor, is it alright that my sister gets the paperwork from you. I would like to stay with Mara for a bit longer?"

"Certainly," the doctor said as he held the door open for Leia.

Luke turned his attention back to his injured friend. He gently held her hand between his. "Mara," Luke whispered, "I'll be back tomorrow. Please get better." He hesitated for a moment, but then leaned over and gently kissed her on the cheek.

.

.

Luke stayed by Mara's bedside for the next two days as she underwent neural reconstruction.

Karrde, Lando, Han and Leia all stopped by to check on her progress. Karrde asked Luke to tell Mara when she woke up not to worry about her job and to take all the time she needed to recover. Lando had graciously volunteered to go on some of Mara's supply runs for Karrde.

Both Han and Lando felt terrible about the accident and neither man could look Luke in the eye. They knew their irresponsible actions caused Mara to be in the lower levels of Coruscant that morning.

Secretly, Luke was glad that Lando was going to be across the galaxy while Mara was recovering but he felt a twinge of guilt at the thought. He knew he was being selfish by trying to keep Mara to himself. But he nearly lost her that day and it made him realize something. He could not imagine not having Mara in his life in some fashion, friend, comrade… or something else. It wasn't just the thought of losing her to death, but also the thought of her moving on with her life, their contact gradually fading as often happens over the years with friends. The thought of their friendship slipping away over time sent a chill up his spine. It was a feeling which unnerved him and made him feel vulnerable, but it was also a feeling he did not want to really face at this time.

.

.

On the third day Mara was taken out of her forced sedation.

"She should slowly regain conscious within the next hour," Dr. Defel said. He, along with Luke, Leia, Han and Karrde were standing by Mara's bedside observing the young woman. "Don't be surprised if she is groggy or a bit confused. It is normal, and should disappear during the course of the day."

It seemed to Luke like an incalculable amount of time passed before they saw Mara's eyelids flutter slightly. Her eyes opened and she blinked against the bright lights of the room. Mara's eyes fell on the entourage standing around her.

She opened her mouth to speak, but paused. Luke picked up her thoughts through the Force and fetched a glass of water.

"Here, drink this," he offered and Mara gulped the water down eagerly. Finally, with her thirst satiated, she once again turned her attention to the people in her hospital room.

"Miss Jade, I am Doctor Defel. I'm a neurologist," he explained before Mara could speak. "You were hit by an airspeeder and sustained a head injury. Do you remember the accident?"

Mara shook her head slowly. "I don't remember anything. How long have I been here?"

"Three days. Your injury was not severe, but you did suffer a violent seizure after the accident. You will need to be on medication and observation for a few months," Dr. Defel said as he made notes on her chart. Luke stepped forward and sat carefully at the edge of Mara's bed before she could object.

"Mara, I volunteered to take care of you. I set up a place for you in my spare bedroom and you can stay with me." Luke smiled, fully expecting Mara to protest, if not at the idea of staying with him, then at least at the thought of being on medications for a few months. To Luke's surprise, Mara said nothing, but just looked at him blankly.

"I am going to live with you?" she finally asked.

Luke immediately rethought his decision. Yes, they were friends but they weren't _that_ close. How could he have just assumed that Mara would accept living with him for at least three months?

"I am sorry, Mara," Luke apologized. "If you would be more comfortable staying with Leia… or with someone else, I will make all the arrangements. I don't want you to think I was being presumptuous. I just felt responsible for your recovery."

"I am not sure if I understand," Mara admitted as she gave him a confused look. "I am in a hospital and for the next couple months I am going to live with you?"

Luke's cheeks burned with embarrassment. "I must admit that was my plan. I'm sorry. I should have waited to talk to you before making these decisions."

"Well, it's just…" she looked up at Luke with a dazed expression, "Who exactly are you?"


	4. Chapter 4

"What? Are you joking Mara?" Luke asked in shock. Mara just gazed at him in confusion. Luke turned to Dr. Defel. "Doctor, she doesn't remember who I am."

The doctor knitted his brow and stepped closer to Mara. He took out a tiny penlight and shinned the beam into Mara's eyes. "Mara," the doctor said quietly as he turned off the penlight, "Do you know anybody in this room?"

Mara looked from face to face with no recognition in her eyes. "No," she said tentatively. "I'm not sure who I am." she said with a tinge of panic in her voice.

"Don't worry Mara," the doctor said calmly. "This may just be a temporary symptom resulting from the head injury. But we will run some more tests, just to be sure." The doctor turned to the visitors in the room. "I think she should get some more rest and I'll arrange for another brain scan. Until then, I would like to ask all of you to give her some time alone to recuperate. I will let you know when she can resume having visitors."

Luke looked like he was about to protest, but his sister tugged on his sleeve and gave him a pleading look. "Luke, you haven't slept for days, you need some rest." Luke nodded reluctantly and followed the group as they slowly filtered their way out of the room. Luke got as far as the waiting room and told his family and friends to go on without him. He then sat down on a padded chair in the corner of the room and promptly fell asleep in complete exhaustion.

.

.

Mara closed her eyes, relishing the silence. Since she woke up in the hospital 24 hours ago her life was a jumbled montage of doctors, medical droids and confusion. People she did not know were talking to her, asking her the same thing over and over.

' _What do you remember, can you still do this activity, can you still read basic, how about this, how about that?'_

It was driving her crazy. She was told that she originally was set to leave the hospital yesterday, but with her memory lapse she would have to endure a new battery of tests. She intensely disliked being prodded and examined like some laboratory animal. She didn't like the hourly wellness checks by medtechs, she didn't like the food…she basically did not like anything about the entire process.

There had been a parade of beings going in and out of her room all day. Finally she begged them to leave; insisting that she needed some rest. It was true. She was tired, but her real reason was she needed time to think about the events of the last few days.

She had been in an accident where she sustained a head injury. That much she knew for sure. She had been with the young blond man when she was injured. He never strayed far from her bedside all day long, lingering around her protectively. What was odd was Mara actually felt safer when he was near. It was almost like he projected warmth and tranquility from his very core.

It was maddening not being able to remember who she was, and, to be honest, Mara was a bit frightened. She didn't like being afraid. She had an incredible desire to flee the hospital and away from the uncertainty. But where would she go? She didn't even know where her home was.

Mara sighed, she had to face it—no matter how uncomfortable it made her—she was now at the mercy of others. At least until her memory returned. And if that never happened… well, she didn't want to think about that. Now she needed to decide what to do.

Her doctor and visitors gave her a number of options. She could go live in a sanatorium for a few months while she recovered, she could go live with one of the people who claimed to be her friends, or she could insist on being brought back to her apartment and would stay under the observation of a medical droid.

She immediately disregarded the first and third option. There was no way she wanted to remain in a hospital environment and, although she hated to admit it, she really didn't want to be alone with only a medical droid for company. The only viable alternative was to stay with someone.

A number of people offered a home for the next few months, but the doctor insisted that she remain on this planet until she was completely off her medication. That left her with the option of living with two people that intended to stay planetside for the duration of her recovery. They said they were brother and sister, although she noted that they didn't look very much alike.

Mara pursed her lips in thought. _'What were their names?'_

Luke and Leia, that was it. The woman was petite with a warm smile. Mara remembered that she was nicely dressed and she immediately thought the woman was of some importance. She had a husband that was tall and handsome in a roguish way. Then there was the brother. He was of average height and build, nice looking, but the one thing Mara recalled distinctly were his eyes. They were of the most brilliant blue. When he looked at her she got a chill up her spine. It was almost like he could look into her soul. And his smile, it was radiant. When he smiled at her she always found herself doing the same. After a few hours her cheeks actually ached as if her facial muscles were being used in an unfamiliar manner.

As a woman she was wary about going to live with a man, but she felt so safe and comfortable around Luke she readily accepted his invitation to stay with him during the recovery. Despite the fear of the unknown involving her illness, Mara felt a twinge of excitement when she thought of spending some more time with the captivating blond man.

' _The next few months are going to be interesting,'_ she thought as she finally drifted to sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

"Well, I have ran some tests and everything looks normal," Dr. Defel explained to Luke as they sat in the doctor's expansive office. The neurologist was behind his desk reading over a datapad and Luke sat across from him in a padded leather seat.

"How can memory loss be normal?" Luke asked.

"Miss Jade appears to be suffering from retrograde amnesia, meaning she is suffering from memory loss from the time prior to the accident. But, fortunately, there does not appear to be any indication of Antegrade Amnesia, meaning memories she is forming now will remain with her." The doctor laid down the datapad and regarded the Jedi.

"That doesn't answer my question." Luke pointed out.

"I don't believe her memory loss is permanent," the doctor explained, "retrograde amnesia is a common result of a profound injury to the temporal and frontal lobes and the use of Neuroleptic medications. The good news is her semantic memory appears to be intact, meaning her general knowledge of the galaxy seems to be unaffected." The doctor paused giving Luke time to absorb the information then continued.

"It is her episodic memory which has been impaired. This is the memory which refers to her life experiences. She doesn't recall events in her life or people she knew. Despite, these problems I predict that when Mara is taken off of her anti-seizure prescription her memory will gradually return."

Luke nodded, finally understanding, as well as feeling through the Force that the doctor fully believed in his diagnoses. "Will she have to remain in the hospital longer?"

The doctor shook his head. "No, in fact I think she is ready for discharge now. I would like to go over the discharge papers with you since you are now her temporary guardian."

Luke nodded and took the datapad the doctor handed him. He still couldn't get over the fact that Mara Jade couldn't remember who she was.

"If you just follow along I will go over any medical restriction. Most of this is just legal jargon; you can read that later if you wish, if you'll skip down to section three, we'll start there."

Luke nodded again and scrolled down the datapad to section three.

"As you can see, Miss Jade does not have any dietary restrictions, but she should avoid alcohol because it can interact with her medication and cause drowsiness. She is encouraged to resume normal activities, and by normal I mean what is considered normal for an average woman of her age."

"Mara is anything but average." Luke couldn't help but grin.

"I realize she is a force-sensitive," the doctor continued, "and to be honest with you, I have no idea how her condition or the medication will affect her Force abilities or how using the Force could affect her condition. I would like to err on the side of caution and say no Force training for the interim and she should not be flying spacecraft or even driving speeders until the time that she is completely weaned off the medication and there is no indication of seizure reoccurrence."

The doctor pushed a couple buttons and scrolled further down the document. "With that said, Mara can do things that normal women her age usually do. She can do aerobic and anaerobic exercises as long as they are not extremely strenuous. She should always be monitored while performing any activity for her safety, though. And of course she can also resume normal sexual activity as long as it's not of the overly stressful nature." The doctor said with a chuckle.

Luke's head snapped up shocked by the doctor's words. His face reddening at the mere thought of Mara performing any sexual activities, let alone the type which could be deemed _stressful_.

"I'm sorry, Master Skywalker." The neurologist said abashed. "I'm usually giving these instructions to a spouse. I wasn't thinking. I didn't mean to embarrass you or insinuate that there is anything between you and Miss Jade," the doctor explained. "This is a standard discharge briefing. And, to be honest, the question of sex is usually asked by patients. I'm afraid I've gotten to the point that I just save myself the trouble and explain it upfront instead of later once the patient finally manages to get the words out and bring the subject up."

Luke shifted in his chair uncomfortably. "Well, I'm sure that subject is not going to come up… at least not while she is living with me."

"Of course, Master Skywalker." The doctor smiled and set down his datapad. "I have already placed a prescription for Mara's medications. You can pick them up at the pharmacy. The pharmacist will give you instructions on the dosage as well as when and how to wean her off the meds when the time comes, but feel free to contact me with questions. If there is any change in Mara's condition let me know, or if she has another seizure, give her the hypospray provided, call a medevac shuttle, and then contact me immediately."

"I will doctor," Luke said as a thought came to him. "Should I be trying to spark some memory in Mara during this time? Should I show her holos or tell her stories of her past?"

"I wouldn't try to force too many memories onto her." the doctor warned. "It could be frustrating to her. Often amnesia patients complain of headaches when deluged with holos and unending stories from well-meaning family members. That doesn't mean you should avoid answering her questions and I am sure she will have many questions. Let her determine the flow of information. And as I said before, I am pretty certain that once she is off the medication her memory will return naturally." Defel went over a few more points and Luke listened intently. Finally the doctor stood up and reached over his desk offering Luke his hand.

Luke stood and grasped the doctor's hand in a firm handshake. "Thanks for everything, doctor."

"No problem. Take good care of her," the doctor said with a smile.

Luke turned to leave. "That I will do doctor. I can promise you that."

.

.

When Luke arrived at Mara's hospital room she had already changed her attire. Lando had brought Mara some street clothes over from her ship, then left on a shipping run in Mara's stead. She was wearing a white tank top and black leather pants with matching leather jacket. The outfit was tight enough to outline every curve of her body.

Luke stopped in the doorway to watch his friend as she packed up a small travel bag. Mara, apparently still unaware of his presence, bent over to pick up a pair of hospital issued slippers from under the bed. In doing so revealing to the Jedi the most perfect posterior he had ever seen grace a woman before.

Luke blushed fiercely when he realized his wayward thoughts were starting to arouse something within him. He shuffled his feet nervously as he ran through a couple Jedi relaxation techniques to calm his libido.

' _What is happening to me?'_ Luke thought apprehensively. _'I have never really seriously thought of Mara in that way before! Why now?'_

Luke was pretty sure he knew the answer. It was the discussion he had with Dr. Defel earlier about Mara, sex and now the looming realization that he was now going to live in close proximity with this woman for at least three months. For the first time Luke wondered if he got himself into a situation that all the Jedi training in the galaxy could not prepared him for— ** _he and Mara Jade were going to be roommates!_**

Shaking his head, Luke brushed the thoughts from his mind. It had been a hard few days and he hadn't gotten as much sleep or Jedi meditation as he would have liked. Everything was going to be fine. Luke was absolutely determined to be the perfect gentleman during Mara's stay at his home.

He ran his fingers through his hair and let out a calming breath. Mara, hearing movement behind her, quickly turned around and stepped back startled. "You scared me," she laughed nervously. "I didn't hear you come in."

"Sorry," Luke said, a slight frown touching his lips. In the past he could never sneak up on Mara unless he shielded himself. Mara would have sensed him through the Force when he first walked into the building, let alone the room. This was something that bothered him, but he would have to wait to see how pronounced her inability to touch the force went.

"Do I really wear this? Or is this some kind of joke?" Mara asked skeptically as she held her arms out while looking down at the outfit she was wearing.

"What?" Luke wasn't exactly sure what she was getting at.

"I wear black leather? Really?" she said with a scoff. "Am I a member of a swoop gang? Do I drive a speeder bike? That is the only logical reason I can think of wearing this much leather." Mara slowly turned around, showing him the outfit.

"No, Mara," Luke almost laughed, "you don't belong to a swoop gang."

"If I am not trying to avoid road rash, then tell me why leather?" Mara let her hands fall down to her sides, but she still glared at her outfit. "Look at these pants! There are no pockets. Where do I put my credit chips? And the underwear, who wears thongs?"

Luke was at a complete loss of words now, images of Mara in nothing but her underwear swimming through his mind. "Umm… I don't know," he finally muttered.

Mara's eyes flew wide and she stepped up to Luke, putting a hand on his shoulder. After looking around to see if anybody was within hearing distance, she whispered in his ear. "I'm not an erotic dancer, am I?" she asked half-seriously.

Luke burst out in laughter, if anything to cover the highly erotic images that bounced to the forefront of his mind. Picking up Mara's travel bag, he turned to face his friend. "No Mara, you are not an erotic dancer. You are second-in-command of a very successful trade organization. As for the leather… you have been wearing that for as long as I have known you."

"Well, I guess that's something." She zipped the jacket up halfway.

"Wait," Luke blinked, "you knew the terms swoop gang, road rash, and erotic dancer."

Mara stared at him blankly, "Um, I guess I did, but I still can only take your word for it that my name is Mara."

"Dr. Defel said that you might remember general knowledge since you didn't forget basic knowledge like speaking and reading." Luke looked down her seriously. "You can you still read, right?"

"Of course," Mara smiled, "but only basic. That man, Cart... or Cade, he said that I know several."

"Karrde, and yes, you do." Luke placed his hand on her shoulder. "Don't worry, we'll see if we can get your memory back sooner rather then later. You ready to go?"

"As ready as I'll ever be," she said giving Luke a brilliant smile. "Thank you for helping me. I don't remember ever being in a medcenter before this, but I am pretty sure I didn't like being in one then and I certainly don't like being in one now."

"No you didn't," Luke chuckled, "And I am glad to help. If you follow me I will show you to my speeder."


	6. Chapter 6

Mara insisted they stop by her small apartment to get some more clothing before they headed to Luke's home. If she was going to be at his place for a few months, she didn't want to spend the entire time in the same leather suit. She was also curious to get a glimpse of her real life.

"I am afraid I don't remember the pass code," Mara said sadly as they stood in front of her door.

"That's okay, I'll get it." Luke leaned over and punched in the access code. The door slid open and Mara started at him slack-jawed. "What?" he asked.

"I had given you the access code to my apartment at one time?" Mara was now wondering about the exact nature of her relationship with this man. Luke told her they were just friends, but was she the type of woman to give her apartment access code to a male who she was simply friends with?

A sheepish look crossed Luke's face. "Ahh… no you never officially gave me your pass code, but you trust me enough to punch in the code in my presence. And, you know, with Force-Enhanced memory I can recall those details."

"Oh…" Mara said noncommittally as she entered her apartment, still unsure of the extent of their relationship. A brief thought flickered through her mind about the Force-Enhanced Memory comment but she decided to ask about it later. She was still too curious about the man who followed her into her apartment, activating the lights.

"Is there something that is bothering you, Mara?"

Mara stopped in the middle of her living room and turned to gaze at the Jedi. "I was wondering about the extent of our relationship," she said hesitantly. "You and everybody else I talked to at the medical center said we are friends. Is that what we are, just friends?"

Luke put Mara's small travel bad on the ground and walked up to her, placing his hands on her shoulders. "Mara, we are more than friends. We're best friends. We're allies. We have worked and fought together. You have saved my life more times than I would like to admit. You were always there for me."

"Friends," Mara repeated to herself, running the word over in her mind. It felt as if something was pushing on her mind. Thoughts were forming and disappearing just as fast.

"You alright?"

"I don't know," Mara shook her head, "for some reason I got the sense that we were more than friends, or perhaps one of us wanted more."

Mara looked up at her friend who was studying her intently, almost as if he could see into her soul. There was that pushing sensation again, like somebody was trying to get into her head. Mara panicked and attempted to mentally push back the feeling. She moaned as she started to feel dizzy.

Luke put one arm around her waist and guided her to her sofa. "You okay?"

"I don't know, I just experienced something like a twinge or jolt through my brain. I hope it wasn't another seizure."

"It wasn't a seizure," Luke assured her

"How do you know?" Mara gazed into his piercing blue eyes. She hadn't noticed just how magnetic they were before.

"I think it is Force related." he said as Mara gave him a confused look. "I'll explain later," he assured her, "First, let me get you a drink of water."

Luke went over to her kitchen. Mara noted that he did not have to search for a glass and he instinctively knew there was a cold-water jug in the refrigerator unit. Friends or not, he had been in her home enough times to know the location of basic things that even she couldn't remember.

He had his back turned to her now, giving Mara a good view of the man. He had a nice behind, Mara thought as she accessed his features. His whole body was very well formed actually, slim, but muscular. Then there were the eyes. It just now occurred to her how handsome of a man her friend was. She then wondered why her pre-accident self never attempted to foster a relationship with him.

A sense of despair surged through her at the thought that maybe she had tried, but he had turned her down. Although, it could be that he was already married. He never mentioned a spouse since she woke up in the hospital, but he could be in some sort of other relationship. Did he already have a girlfriend?

Another thought struck her. Maybe he wasn't interested in women at all. He was an incredibly handsome, well mannered, kind man, which something told her was almost too good to be true. There had to be some reason why some woman had not snatched him up. And there was also the way he stared intently at that fellow Lando when they were visiting her at the hospital.

She wasn't sure what she thought about Lando when she first saw him. He was perfectly groomed and he had teeth so white she was sure he must have had them professionally whitened. But what really struck her were the flamboyant outfits he always wore. One was almost comical with skin tight black pants and a flowing black cape with an extremely unmanly purple silk lining.

_'A cape! Who wears a cape?'_ She chuckled to herself softly.

"What's so funny," Luke asked as he handed her a glass of water.

Mara shook her head softly. "I was thinking of Lando."

"Oh?" Luke said cautiously. "What about?"

Mara flushed, embarrassed that she speculating on the sex lives of two men who showed her nothing but extreme kindness while she was recovering.

"It's nothing." She said then took a sip of water. "I feel better. Should we get packing?"

Luke realized she was changing the subject, but he wasn't sure he wanted to press her for an answer at this time... especially one he might not like the answer to.

Mara rose and walked to the back of the apartment where she assumed the bedroom was located. She noted that the entire apartment was a bit spartan with little in the way of adornment.

"I guess I wasn't much into interior decorating," she commented.

"Oh, I wouldn't say that," Luke countered. "It is just you live mainly on your ship. You didn't stay here enough to bother with niceties."

Luke opened Mara's closet and rummaged around looking for a suitcase or large travel bag. He finally located a large leather bag, which he dragged out and threw on top of her bed.

Mara wandered over to the closet to inspect its contents.

"It appears I do have a fondness for leather and body suits." Mara said as she sorted through her clothing. "Leather, leather, body suit, leather, flight suit, more flight suits."" Mara said as she flicked through her wardrobe before pulling out a green body suit with a matching green shirt-dress top with leather shoulder pads. "What in the world is this? Do I moonlight as a forest princess? Who wears this stuff? Where are the normal clothes? Don't I own any dresses?"

Luke couldn't help but laugh. "I am sure they are some, I remember seeing you in a few at the occasional formal balls you attended." Luke assured her.

"Oh I see the formal gowns," Mara said. "But I want to know is do I have any everyday dresses? Something where it doesn't look like I am going to a royal wedding or out on a sabotage mission?"

Luke grinned. "Mara, I can get my sister to go shopping with you for some more casual attire later, if you like."

To Luke's surprise she gave him a genuine smile. "I would really like that."

Mara turned back to her closet. She skipped over the leather and tight fitting garments and picked what few casual outfits she owned—a couple loose flowing skirts, flight suits, and pants. She stole a glance over to Luke who was opening up her dresser drawers to search for items to pack. _'He is not a bad looking man this Skywalker. Maybe I should pack a few sexier outfits just to see if he is attracted to women.'_ Mara smiled at the blond man as she threw a few seductive gowns into the suitcase.

While Luke was standing by Mara's dresser his eyes were immediately drawn to a series of Holocubes arranged neatly on top. The first few were of Mara and the crew of the Wild Karrde. The holos appeared to be taken at a party. Mara, Karrde, Aves and other various crewmembers gave overly exuberant smirks to an unknown cameraman. Luke noted with a grin that they all looked like they had a little too much to drink that night. Another holo was of Mara and Kyle Katarn standing in front of her ship.

The last two holocubes surprised him. The first one was of Luke standing in his Jedi blacks with lightsaber in hand on top of the Massassi Temple. Luke remembered when the holo was taken. It was Leia's idea for a publicity shoot for the Academy. She thought it was the right time to improve the image of the Jedi by demystifying them to the general public.

Luke smiled as he realized Mara must have contacted the reporter and ordered a copy of the holo. Luke picked up the last hologram cube to get a better look. It was of Mara and Luke at the Jedi Academy during a lightsaber sparring match. Mara's face was an image of grim determination, but even so, Luke could detect a gleam of mischief in her eyes. If he remembered correctly, she almost beat him in that match.

Luke almost dropped the holocube as Mara's arm snaked around him to gently take the holo from his hand.

"Can I see that?" Mara asked quietly.

She gazed at the image intently, looking up at Luke and back to the holocube. The corners of her mouth curled slightly as she handed the cube back to Luke. "So it looks like we actually do know each other," she said with a smirk. "It is good to know that you aren't some lunatic that roams around the neurology ward looking for women to pick up." She winked at Luke and then turned back to her closet.

Luke put the holo down. "You already knew that, didn't you?"

She turned back at him and cocked her head to the side questionably. "Yes, for some reason I did. I don't know why, but me being with you seems right."

Luke could only stare at her. He had never heard her speak her mind so openly before, especially when it came to the way Mara felt… especially about him. He quickly pulled himself out of his musings and went back to work.

He opened the first drawer, grabbed a handful of shirts and shorts and placed them in the suitcase. He opened the next drawer and blanched. Mara, feeling that something was strange with her friend, turned to look at him. "What is it?"

Luke chuckled nervously. "I think you should pack the items in this drawer."

Mara walked up to inspect the contents and then smirked. "Don't tell me that you are shy, Luke?" She reached into the drawer and pulled out a pair of petite lace panties.

"It's not that… well okay, I am a bit shy, but I just prefer that you do the selection when it comes to your undergarments."

Mara raised an eyebrow and smiled at Luke. "Okay… let's see what we have here." She picked up another pair of underwear. "I guess I do have a thing for thongs," she laughed. "I guess I don't like panty lines when I am wearing those skin tight body suits."

Luke looked away. "I guess," he said with a shy smile. "I never saw any panty lines."

"Oh, so you admit to checking out my backside," Mara teased him playfully.

"No… I mean I have seen your backside. But I wasn't going out of the way to look at it. Sometimes it was just there and I just can't help but see it." Luke became flustered. He knew he was rambling. He grabbed an armful of Mara's undergarments and tossed them in the bag. "I think we have enough clothes for now," Luke said. "We can come back for more later if we have to."

"Okay Luke," Mara said as she closed the bag. "I was just giving you a hard time. I can't help it. You just look so cute when you are flustered." She laughed at she lifted the bag off the bed and walked past Luke to the front door.

The Jedi was temporarily taken aback. Not only did Mara call him by his first name, but she also said he was cute. This was definitely not like the Mara he remembered. _'This is going to be a long 3 months,'_ Luke thought anxiously as he followed his friend out of the apartment.


	7. Chapter 7

When Luke and Mara arrived at his apartment, Luke gave Mara a quick tour of his home and showed her to her room. Luke then gave her some privacy so she could put away her things and relax. Meanwhile he set out to prepare dinner.

A half-hour later he knocked on Mara's door.

"Mara, dinner's ready."

Mara opened her door and gave Luke a warm smile. "You didn't need to go to all that trouble. I don't want to be a burden to you."

"It is no problem whatsoever." Luke responded kindly. "I made Kassha Pasta noddles with Blue Milk Lurcia sauce, it's your favorite."

"How do you know it is my favorite?" she asked.

"Like I said Mara, we're best friends," Luke helped Mara to her seat, then walked around the table and sat across from his companion.

"Why is that exactly?" she asked as she unfolded her napkin and placed it on her lap.

"Why is what?" Luke asked confused.

"Why are we best friends? I may have lost my memory, but I do know that becoming best friends does not happen on a whim. There must be a wonderful story behind our getting together."

Luke poured wine into their glasses. He was frantically wondering how much of her past he should tell her. He didn't want to dump all the infamous details of her life on her at once.

"Well, the first time we met was the first time you saved my life," he said cautiously.

"Really? What a fortunate first meeting," she said as she twirled pasta around her fork, and then took a tentative bite. "Mmmm… this is good. I can see why this dish is my favorite."

Luke smiled. "Thanks." He took a sip of wine. "Yes, I guess you could say our first encounter was auspicious. You see I was stranded in deep space and would have died within hours if you did not find me. You were navigating on one of Karrde's ships and just happened to be at the right place at the right time." Luke knew her finding him was no coincidence, but he didn't think telling Mara that she wanted to kill him and was actively hunting him was appropriate at this time.

"Is that how we became best friends?"

"Umm… no." Luke vacillated. "You see, Mara, you used to be part of the old Imperial Government and I was a major player in the Rebellion that overthrew that regime. So you really didn't like me very much when we first met." Luke chuckled and then took another bite of his food allowing Mara time to consider what he just said.

"So, I didn't like you at first because of our political differences, but I finally succumbed to your boyish charm I suppose?" Mara laughed then continued eating.

Luke smiled. He was enjoying his time with Mara. She has been so relaxed since awaking from the hospital which was somewhat strange because this must be a very confusing and difficult time for his friend. It was like she was a whole new person. She didn't bite his head off at any perceived affront to her. She was outgoing and he had heard her laugh more today then he had in the past year.

"I don't know about my boyish charm… but we did work together to save a lot of people's lives and a truce was made… from that truce we became friends… and from friends to best friends," Luke admitted.

Secretly he wondered if this relationship would evolve from best friends into something else. Mara's newfound openness made this an opportune time to broach the subject with her. Luke immediately dismissed the idea. _'It would be unethical. Not only am I her pseudo-guardian, but her friend. I can't do anything until her memory returns.'_

"I'm glad we're friends." Mara said in between bites. "I'm glad I didn't have to stay at the hospital any longer than I had to." She gave Luke an appreciative look. "So Luke, I assume you aren't married, but are you currently seeing someone? If so, what does she think about me staying with you during my recovery?"

Mara immediately regretted her question when she saw the sad look that crossed Luke's face. "No, there was someone, but that relationship ended long ago."

Mara reached across the table and laid her hand on top of his. Luke almost jumped at the unexpected warm gesture. "I'm sorry Luke. I didn't know… or maybe I did, but I don't now… I'm sorry to bring up bad memories."

Luke looked down at her hand resting on his and smiled. He rotated his hand so he could grasp hers and give it a gentle squeeze. "It's okay Mara. It's in my past and I have dealt with it. Now I look forward to what the future might bring."

Luke held on until the moment became awkward. He quickly released her and went back to eating.

"Maybe not now, but eventually I would like to find out more about my past life." Mara said quietly. "In that holocube at my apartment I noticed we were sparing. Was I a soldier?"

"Do you know what Jedi are?" Luke asked Mara.

Mara thought about it for a while. "It is a religious-warrior sect, isn't it? Am I part of that?"

Luke smiled. "You have some Force training and you are especially good with the lightsaber. In fact, you have all the qualities that would make a good Jedi. I was hoping you would eventually decide to join the Order officially and come to the Academy, but your work with Karrde has kept you from completing your training."

"They can read minds and move things, why can't I do that?" Mara asked.

Luke shook his head. "I think the part of the brain that helps in controlling that power is affected by either your medication or your injury. When you got dizzy earlier I think you were trying to access the Force. I am sure when you are off the medication everything will go back to normal." Luke assured her. "Hey, I almost forgot," Luke said changing the subject, "when you were in your room I called my sister and she agreed to go shopping with you tomorrow. You can buy some clothes you will feel more comfortable in."

Mara smiled brightly. "Thank you Luke. I really look forward to it. Your sister seems so nice. Leia and I, are we friends?" Mara asked.

"Umm… sure." Luke hedged. "You two aren't as close as us, but I would say you were friends. You saved Leia's life and the lives of her twins. I would say you hold a special part in her heart."

Mara put down her fork and looked at her companion. "It is so strange to hear about things I've done in the past and I have absolutely no memory of them. At least the stories are all good." Mara laughed softly and went back to eating.

Luke glanced up at his companion. "Well, most of the stories are good. I am sure everybody has things in their life that they regret."

She looked up at him feeling there was more meaning to the words, but Luke did not expand on the subject. So she decided to quit the interrogation and quietly enjoy the meal. She had months to find out what made Luke Skywalker tick.


	8. Chapter 8

The next morning Luke awoke to the aroma of something delicious cooking. He slipped on some underclothes, shorts and shirt and padded softly out to the kitchen. There he found Mara preparing breakfast. She looked up at his entrance and grinned at the Jedi Master.

"I am preparing your favorite, scrambled Fash eggs, with a side of fried hanadak meat strips and topped off with a cool glass of blue milk."

Luke was shocked by not only the kindness of the act, but the fact that Mara could not only cook, but she remembered what he liked. "Wow, this is absolutely wonderful, Mara. Are you getting your memory back?" Luke asked hopefully.

"No, I told your R2 droid what you had in the refrigeration unit and asked him to pull up on the datapad something I could whip up that you would like. He assured me this was your favorite."

"It is, it is," Luke had a broad grin on his face. "I didn't know you could cook."

"I just followed the directions. It's not like I am overhauling a hyperdrive." She lifted an eyebrow and gave the Jedi a mischievous look. "You mean to say that I never made breakfast for you?"

"No, on all the missions we went on you seemed to prefer ration bars to real food." Luke said, oblivious to any hidden meaning to her question.

He went to the kitchen cabinet and put out two place settings at the dining room table. Mara brought the food to the table then Luke did the gentlemanly thing and pulled out Mara's chair and assisted her in sitting at the table. He then sat down across from his beautiful companion. "It all looks wonderful. Thank you Mara."

"It is the least I can do," she remarked as they started to dig into the meal, "you cooked dinner for me."

"Wow, this is fantastic," Luke said as he finished off one of the meat strips. "Oh, don't forget, my sister will be here in an hour to take you shopping."

Mara looked up with a concerned look on her face. "Do I have credits? I don't remember if I have a credit account or not."

"Don't worry Mara. I'll give you my credit chip. You can pay me back later. I trust you… after all… I do know where you live." Luke gave Mara a grin.

"Do you want to come shopping with us girls?" Mara asked eagerly.

Luke shook his head. "Sorry, but I'm usually not on Coruscant this long and the New Republic is taking the opportunity to schedule meetings concerning every possible state of affairs affecting me or the Jedi—from the skirmishes with the Black Sun crime organization, Academy operational funding meetings, talks about the Imperial Remnant…" Luke trailed off. "I should warn you I am going to be busy for a while with the senate and aspects of the New Republic, so there may be nights I will be late." He gave her an apologetic look.

Mara shrugged, "I can find ways to keep myself busy. I saw your entertainment center set up. There are hundreds of streaming holos I can watch. I think I will watch some history documentaries. "

"That sounds good," Luke said nodding, "I don't like leaving you here alone with Artoo and an old FX-series medical assistant droid. I will try to get my sister or some of your other friends to drop by when I know I will be delayed. "

"Thanks Luke," Mara smiled then went back to her meal. She was very eager to spend time with Leia. Nobody should know more about Mara's attractive roommate than his sister. It will be interesting to see what secrets she will reveal.  
.

.

Mara and Leia had spent all morning and part of the afternoon shopping. They took a break from their purchasing to have a late lunch at one of Coruscant's outdoor cafés. After their meal they both treated themselves to the establishment's specialty, Amarar hot chocolate with a dash of Reguun root, an herb reputed to be a mood enhancer in humans.

"I don't know when I had such a fun afternoon." Leia laughed. "I forgot how much I enjoyed shopping with someone… well someone other than Han."

"Han isn't much of a shopper?" Mara asked.

"No, he is the type that has a list. He goes into the store and buys exactly what is on the list and nothing else."

"Do you think Luke will like the outfits I bought?" Mara asked Leia with a devious smile.

"I think if you go out in public with some of those outfits he will have to fight off other males with a lightsaber." Leia teased as she took another sip of hot chocolate. Leia wasn't sure if it was the Reguun root, but Mara was extremely happy and talkative today to the point of being giddy.

"I hope he likes them." A wide smile burst across her face, but her eyes had a faraway look. Leia noticed Mara would have the same smitten expression whenever she spoke of Luke. Eventually Mara would realize she was daydreaming, blush and get back to talking…usually about Luke.

"So you and Luke really didn't meet until you were in your late teens?" Mara remarked, referring to an earlier conversation. "That must have been a shock to find out you had a brother?"

"It was, and I am glad we found out, because I think Luke may have had a small crush on me when we first met."

Mara's jaw dropped. "Oh no, that could've been bad."

Leia chuckled, "Nothing would have happened. For some reason I always saw Luke as a brother."

"How did you find out you were related?" Mara asked curious.

"Luke's mentor's Obi-Wan and Yoda let him know eventually. I think they wanted to keep it a secret as long as possible in order to protect me from our biological father."

"Was he abusive?" Mara asked concerned.

Leia couldn't help but laugh as such an innocent question.

_' Was Darth Vader an abusive father?'_ That was the understatement of the galaxy.

"Abusive is too kind of a word. He was a monster." Leia's voice was tight with emotion. She didn't like talking about Vader and she really didn't want to have this conversation. Talking about Vader would lead to a conversation about the Emperor and perhaps to the Emperor's Hand. She didn't see any harm in allowing Mara a short reprieve from memories of those two murderous Sith.

Mara obviously sensed the change in Leia's mood. "Well, I am glad you found your brother. And Luke told me all about your children and husband. It must be wonderful having a family." Mara commented wistfully, "Luke says I never knew my parents. I think it would be nice to be part of a family. Does Luke want children?"

That comment caused a coughing fit from Leia as the hot chocolate went down the wrong pipe.

"I think you need to ask Luke that question." Leia deferred.

_'Uh oh,'_ Leia thought apprehensively. Although, she relished the camaraderie they enjoyed together today, Leia was somewhat concerned about Mara's obvious personality change. It was not like her to be this lighthearted and talkative. And what really shocked Leia was Mara did nothing to hide her intense interest in Luke. Normally Leia would love the idea of a beautiful woman romancing her stoic brother, but this was not a normal situation. If Luke succumbed to Mara's charm would he end up on the business end of a lightsaber when she regained her memory?

"What are you going to do this afternoon?" Leia asked, trying to move the conversation away from babies.

Mara thought about it for a minute. "I plan on watching historical documentaries. I'd like to see if they can jar my memory."

"That's good." Leia said noncommittally, hoping that any jarring of Mara's memory wouldn't end up as a jarring experience for her brother.

.

.

Luke rushed back to his apartment late that night. He was upset that the conference with the New Republic finance committee took so long to hammer out a budget for the Jedi Academy. He hoped Mara was not too upset with him.

He walked into his apartment to the sound of laughter.

"Mara?" he called out.

"Luke!" Mara exclaimed excitedly as she turned off the HoloNet projector then rushed to the front foyer to meet him. Luke was immediately struck by the outfit she was wearing. He thought her body suits were eye-catching, but this outfit was…well, the best word for it was shocking. It was a very, very short black nightclub dress with two slash openings on one of the three quarter sleeves and another diagonal opening near the hem, exposing even more flesh. The fabric was stretchy to allow the full display of her figure.

Luke could only stand and stare. Mara frowned, "You don't like my dress."

Luke coughed. "I love it, where's the rest of it?" He jested.

She smiled and went to him grabbing his arm pulling him to the couch. "I had a wonderful time with your sister today!" Mara said as she took a seat and then quickly readjusted her dress so parts of her would not fall out of the fabric.

"She helped me pick out some outfits, we shopped for shoes, had lunch together and we really got to know each other."

"That's wonderful." Luke was extremely glad the day turned out well.

"And when I came back to the apartment," Mara continued, " I watched a holo about the rebellion against the Empire." She gave Luke an appraising look. "I must say you are much shorter in real life than in the holos." She then laughed, making Luke wonder if she spent part of her time with Leia drinking.

"Mara, what was the name of the Holo?" He asked curiously.

_"The Death of the Empire"_ Mara said enthusiastically, "It was amazing!"

Luke groaned. The _"Death of the Empire"_ was an old Hapan adventure holo that was high on action and low on accuracy. And, of course, being that it was filmed in Hapes, it meant all the actors were extreme examples of human perfection. The fellow that portrayed Luke was a Hapan bodybuilding champion who was at least a head taller than Luke with wide shoulders and narrow waist.

Luke remembers watching the adventure holo years ago. He also remembered cringing whenever he saw the outdoor billboard exhibits for that particular holo. It had the actor portraying Luke in a heroic pose, shirt open exposing his massive chest muscles, brandishing his lightsaber over his head in a two-handed grip while an actress portraying his sister stood near him in a alluring pose while wearing a shear white dress that did nothing to hide her legs or cleavage.

Of course, since this movie was made right after the destruction of the first Death Star, nobody at the time knew Luke and Leia were siblings. The movie was heavy on sexual innuendos between Luke and Leia and also Leia and Han.

_'That was probably the worst "Luke Skywalker" movie Mara could have watched to find out more about me,'_ Luke thought.

"And after I finished watching that," Mara continued, "I watched _"Hold my lightsaber"._

Luke's jaw dropped. _'No, **that** was the worst holo she could have watched,'_ he corrected himself.

"Mara," Luke said almost choking on his words. _"Hold my Lightsaber"_ is a Kuat pleasure holo!"

Mara burst out in laughter. "I must say, the man who played you could really handle a lightsaber." She grinned at Luke, "Can I see your lightsaber," she said with a false look of innocence as she reached around his waist under the pretense of looking for his weapon.

"Okay," Luke said standing before she could grab a hold of anything. "I think you had a little too much fun for today. The doctor said you should take it easy," he reminded her as he pulled her off the couch and attempted to maneuver Mara and her mini dress towards her room. "I think maybe you should lie down and get some rest. Tomorrow, I'll talk to Dr. Defel to see if we need to adjust your medication." Luke said anxiously.

Mara put her hands on her hips and gave him an exasperated look. It was the same glare the pre-accident Mara would give him when she wasn't getting her way. But, that expression quickly disappeared and morphed to a come-hither grin that Luke was becoming very familiar with these past few days.

"Come on Luke, let's go clubbing," she begged him as she grabbed him by his belt and tried to pull him toward her seductively.

Luke panicked. The combination of her erotic clothing and flirtatious manner was getting to be just too much for any man to resist…even a Jedi. Luke needed to extricate himself from this situation quickly.

"Sorry Mara, but doctor's orders" Luke said sternly as he pointed toward her bedroom door. She gave him a disappointed look and crossed her arms across her chest stubbornly.

"Please Mara." Luke begged.

She rolled her eyes and let out a sigh, "Alright, but only because you are so adorable when I see you beg." She winked at him and then turned and went to her room.

Once the door was closed, Luke leaned against the wall and gave a deep sigh of relief. He then went back to his couch, grabbed the remote control and immediately blocked the adult-only holo channel.

"Yep," Luke said quietly, "the next stop is to see Dr. Defel."


	9. Chapter 9

"Let me see if I understand you correctly," Dr. Defel said incredulously. "You are concerned about Miss Jade because she has been kind, thoughtful, gregarious and generally a nice person to be around?"

Luke couldn't help but laugh. He had to admit that pretty much summed up what he'd been saying to the doctor for the last ten minutes. "I know it sounds crazy, but I am a bit concerned about her obvious personality change."

The doctor leaned back in his chair and frowned. "So are you saying Miss Jade is usually a contemptible, thoughtless, introvert, who you detest spending time with?"

Luke shook his head fervently. "No, no, no, not at all… it's just that the Mara I once knew was much more reserved in just about every aspect of her life, especially when it came to expressing her emotions. She has never been what you would call carefree or overly outgoing. She had few close friends, but the friends she did have she was fiercely loyal to. And well, she did take pleasure in making my life difficult, which she doesn't seem to do at all now…or not in the same way at least. It is like she is a whole different person."

The doctor pursed his lips in thought. He grabbed a datapad off his desk and thumbed through a few screens until he found what he was looking for. "I am not a psychiatrist or a psychologist, but I can make an educated guess as to her personality change. While Miss Jade was at the hospital I took the liberty to look up her background. What I found was very interesting. I assume you know her previous profession?"

"You mean her time as the Emperor's personal assassin?" Luke asked.

"Yes, there is not much written about her time with the Emperor, but I assume she was under his influence for many years."

Luke shifted in his seat, suddenly feeling uncomfortable, like he was gossiping about a dear friend. "She was taken as a child and raised in the Imperial Court." Luke finally admitted.

"I see." The doctor said. "That explains a lot."

"Like what?" Luke asked.

"Well, I assume that life around the Emperor was not a pleasant experience. From how you describe Mara normally, it looks like she may be carrying around a lot of emotional baggage that has affected how she relates with other people. I can only imagine that as an assassin she was probably trained to disassociate from others in order to kill. Emotional detachment would definitely be needed to assassinate people as a profession." The doctor put the datapad down then rubbed his chin between his fingers philosophically.

"Now that Mara has forgotten her past it appears she is no longer throwing up the emotional shields." The doctor leaned forward putting his elbow on the desk and rested his chin in his hand. "I think what you are seeing is what Mara Jade would have been like if she never was taken to the Emperor and forced to kill in his name."

"So this is what Mara would have been like if she had a normal childhood?" Luke asked.

"It is only a guess, but I think it is a reasonable explanation." The doctor said, "There is a very good chance that when her memories return so will her usual personality quirks, both good and bad. Until then, the only thing I can recommend is that you try to make sure her new "fun and free" personality doesn't put her in situations that she may regret when her memories do return."

"I'm trying," Luke said uneasily.

"Oh, I probably should warn you," the doctor continued as he sat back in this chair and gave Luke a concerned look. "When her memory does return usually older memories reappear first and as time progresses memories of more recent experiences should come back. Therefore, Miss Jade is probably going to recall her time during the rebellion before she will remember what has been happening to her in the last couple years. This is referred to as a shrinking retrograde amnesia."

"Oh great," Luke groaned as he leaned forward cradling his head in his hands. In a couple weeks he would start weaning her off her medications. If Mara remembered her older memories first she probably is going to remember Luke, not as a friend, but somebody she was suppose to kill.

_'I have a bad feeling about this.'_   Luke thought apprehensively.


	10. Chapter 10

For the next two weeks the senate was on their mid-cycle break giving Luke a much-needed holiday from political discussions and much more time to devote to Mara and her recovery.

They spent most of their mornings together often going to the gym for a light workout or doing meditation exercises. This was usually followed by a quiet lunch back at the apartment or a local restaurant. In the evenings Luke kept Mara occupied by touring a museum or attending a show at the theatre.

She would ask him questions during their quiet moments together and Luke tried to answer them truthfully, but not heartlessly. When Mara finally asked him what she did during the war, he told her a watered down version of the truth.

_'The Emperor would call on you when he had certain political situations he wanted resolved.'_ He had explained to Mara. _'You specialized in…um…'_ Luke tried to grasp for the right words, _'aggressive negotiations with personnel falling under the leadership of the Emperor. And, well, if deliberations didn't work you would often have to terminate that person… that person's employment with the Empire.'_

Luke knew it was a load of bantha poodoo, but As old Obi-Wan would say, _'What I told you is true…from a certain point of view.'_

Luke didn't like being elusive in his answers. He knew he should tell Mara the whole truth. It would probably be easier for her and safer for him if he warned her of what she would soon remember…but he loved seeing her smile. For a short time she had her childhood that the Emperor stole from her. He couldn't take that away. He wanted to make the next few weeks the happiest times of her life. Hopefully her new enjoyable memories would be so strong they would obscure some of her darker recollections when they did reappear.

Luke truly wanted to make her happy, but he also knew his actions weren't entirely selfless. He loved being with Mara and the fact that she openly enjoyed his company warmed Luke's heart tremendously. He soon realized that with each passing day he was becoming more and more enamored with this captivating woman that was now his temporary roommate.

_'Temporary.'_ What a gut-wrenching thought.

He had become so accustomed to seeing her everyday he couldn't imagine not being this close to her always. He only hoped that when her memories returned she would still want to be around him.

Although Luke was anxious about the outcome of her memory restoration, he still wanted it to happen sooner than later. He longed to have his old Mara back. No matter how much fun they had together since the accident, it didn't feel right. To Luke it was like he was out with Mara's clone…albeit a very happy-go-lucky and outgoing clone. But Luke knew in his heart that nothing beats the real thing. He wanted Mara back whole.

In the meantime, he was going take Dr. Defel's advice and make sure his exuberant roommate stayed out of trouble. To Luke's dismay, this was easier said than done. In the last couple weeks it had become very apparent that Mara had not only lost her memory, but also much of her previous inhibitions. She was young, happy, and wanted to enjoy life to the fullest.

Luke tried to acquiesce to most of Mara's requests. They even went clubbing...once. That particular evening could go down in the record books as one of the most challenging nights of his life. Luke had never been to a nightclub of that nature before. It was loud, extremely crowded and to Luke's mortification it appeared that every dance routine involved body gyrations that mimicked the act of procreation. He was so happy when Mara finally said she was ready to go home.

The next day was one he would never forget. While watching the morning HoloNet broadcast, Luke was shocked to see his face in the news. Apparently, another patron in the club shot a holo of Luke and Mara in a very seductive embrace and rushed it off to the press. In the holo Mara was facing away from the camera, but you could clearly see Luke and in the picture it appeared that the Jedi had both hands firmly clasped over Mara's derrière. The headline was ** _Jedi Master Caught in Cheeky Cover-up!_**

Immediately his comm-unit started buzzing.

_'Leia, I was trying to hold down her dress,'_ Luke had tried to explain to his sister that morning. _'She was wearing that short, short outfit you helped her buy, and I think she was only wearing a thong underneath! Why she suddenly decides that particular night that thongs were the way to go, I have no idea! She was overexposing herself! If I didn't do something she probably would have caused a stampede of would-be suitors. You should have seen the men gaping at her!'_

Leia was no help. She burst out laughing and reminded the Jedi that she offered to care for Mara during her recovery. In the background he heard Han shout, _"Hey Luke, tell Mara we have a metal bikini she can borrow the next time you to go out!"_

Despite the occasional embarrassing moment, Luke was terribly disappointed when the senate returned to session and Jedi business once more got in the way. He found himself being pulled away more often in the following days to attend long and tedious meetings with the NR finance department concerning the Jedi Academy.

Today was no different. He was able to spend a little time with Mara in the morning, but the afternoon was bogged down in meetings. It was way past dinnertime before Luke was able to break away from the mind-numbingly boring Bothan senator who headed the NR Accounting Advisory Board.

Luke hastily drove his speeder home, anxious to get back to Mara. Over the past weeks he discovered he relished the feeling of coming home to her.

Usually she greeted him when he came in the door, but today Mara was nowhere to be found. Luke stretched out with the Force and realized she was not in the apartment, or the building.

"Artoo!"

The little droid rolled around a corner and stopped in front of Luke whistling frantically and rocking back and forth.

Luke looked at the datapad he had hooked up on R2D2 to facilitate communication between the two. His eyes narrowed as the words scrolled across the pad.

"So Lando came and took Mara out for dancing and dinner."

Luke was surprised at how irritated this made him. She was his responsibility. Luke went to the 'fresher and opened the medicine cabinet. He was relieved to see that Mara had taken her anti-seizure medication with her.

Still, he didn't like the idea of Lando being with her. Mara was not herself and Luke was sure the smooth-talking entrepreneur knew it and was taking full advantage of the situation. Luke realized that even if the rumors about the two once having a relationship were true, he was sure it was long over. Mara's actions toward Lando on the day of the accident told him that much. When Mara got her memory back, she would never forgive him if he let her get into a situation with Lando that she wouldn't normally be involved in. Or, at least, that was the story Luke was telling himself. He didn't want to admit he was a little jealous.

"Artoo, did they say where they were going?"

.

.

Luke reached out with the Force and tried to feel Mara's presence in the densely packed nightclub. Although it was hard to separate the various Force signatures he was sure Mara was not at the Club that they told Artoo they were heading to, and, unfortunately for Luke, they didn't mention which restaurant they would go to afterwards.

Luke's ears were ringing as he exited the loud and smoky establishment. He walked across the street to a quiet park and sat down on a bench. He closed his eyes and reached out with the Force looking for Mara. After a few minutes of searching he found her. He jumped into his speeder and drove quickly toward the source. Soon he found himself at an upscale apartment complex. Luke scowled as he recognized the address.

"Lando's apartment," he whispered as he used the Force to override the security lock on the front entrance and quickly made his way up to his old friend's flat where he depressed the door chime button and held it until Lando opened the door looking irritated over the interruption.

"Luke?" Upon seeing who was leaning on the doorbell he gave Luke a confused smile. "Come on in, Mara and I were just finishing dinner. I was about to offer her dessert."

"I bet you were," Luke said under his breath as he unceremoniously brushed by Lando and into his apartment. Just as Lando stated, they were having dinner. Mara was sitting at a large and ornate dinner table decked out with what looked like the remains of a 7-course meal.

When she saw Luke a smile burst across her face. "Luke," she said cheerfully, "I see you got the message I left with your droid. Lando came by and was nice enough to show me around town and treat me to dinner tonight."

"How very nice of him," Luke said with a tight smile. He turned to Lando who had followed him into the dining room. "Lando, Can I talk to you for a minute, privately?" Luke whispered the last word as he put an arm around his shoulder and led him into the kitchen. "What are you doing Lando?" Luke asked sharply as soon as they were out of earshot of Mara.

"What do you mean, we are just having dinner." Lando said defensively.

Luke shook his head in disbelief and scoffed. "You mean to say you didn't bring her here in the hopes of getting her into bed?"

Lando gave a look of shock and Luke could feel his outrage through the Force. "Mara's my friend Luke, I have to admit that normally I would jump at the chance to seduce her, but I know she's not herself. And I also know that if I did have sex with her she would cut off all protruding parts of my body with her lightsaber when she did recover her memory... and some of those parts I have become quite fond of." Lando gave Luke a look of disgust as he went to the cooling unit and pulled out bottled ale not bothering to offer Luke any.

He took a long sip and then glared at Luke. "I can't believe you came running over here to accuse me of something so despicable. I will have you know that Mara is the one who asked me out! I simply came by your place to drop off some of Mara's personal items from the _Wild Karrde_. She was bored and wanted to get out of the apartment for a while. Her doctor had told her she shouldn't go out alone so she asked me to be her escort. She asked me out!" Lando dragged-out the last sentence for emphasis.

Luke immediately felt ashamed for insinuating his friend had ulterior motives, but now it was Lando's turn to be angry.

"I can't believe you would have the audacity to accuse me of taking advantage of Mara. You burst into my apartment like a jealous..." Lando stopped suddenly and gave Luke an amazed look. "You are jealous! Aren't you? You are interested in Mara!" He said with a smug smile.

"What? No..." Luke sputtered, "I just feel responsible for Mara's health. She got hurt saving my life."

Lando acted like he didn't hear the Jedi. "Oh man, Luke, I never knew, but now that I think about it, I can see the signs."

Luke shook his head slightly. "Lando, that's not it..." he trailed off weakly.

"Luke, you old dog." He said as he nudged the Jedi in the shoulder and then gulped down the remainder of his beer. "Hey, I think that's great. I don't mind a little competition. We both like Mara, so let the best man win." The dark skinned man said confidently.

Luke balked of the idea of competing for Mara's affection like she was a prize to be won.

"This is not a game, Lando," Luke said sharply.

Calrissian gave the Jedi a serious look. "I don't see it as a game, Luke. I really like Mara and even though I am going to be the perfect gentleman until her memory is restored, I don't see any harm in showing her a good time as a platonic friend in meantime. This way, when her memory does return, maybe she will soften her stance towards me." He cocked his head to the side and gave Luke a smile, "Unless you intend on keeping her to yourself, locked up in your apartment. That doesn't seem quite fair to her."

Luke shook his head, "No, Mara can do as she pleases. I just want to make sure her health is not at risk or she falls prey to people trying to take advantage of her memory loss. Can I trust you not to take advantage of the situation?"

Lando smiled as he wrapped an arm around Luke's shoulder in a friendly hug, "Sure, Luke old buddy, I swear I won't betray your trust."

"Is everything alright?"

Both men startled at the sound of Mara's voice. Lando dropped his arm off Luke's shoulder and turned to give the redhead a warm smile. "Hey Mara, Luke was just a little worried about you." The gambler smiled at Luke and then turned back to Mara. "Worried about your health, that is."

"Oh," Mara said as she looked first to Luke, then to Lando, then back again.

"If you are ready Mara, I can give you a ride back home." Luke said.

"Oh, okay," She said tentatively.

"Thank you Mara for a lovely evening," Lando said as he took her hand and pressed it lightly to his lips. To Luke's astonishment Mara giggled and blushed slightly at Lando's touch.

"The pleasure was all mine," she assured him, then turned to Luke offering him her arm.

Luke led her out of Lando's apartment, but not before looking back and giving a warning glare to his grinning friend.


	11. Chapter 11

Luke flatly refused to attend any governmental meetings the week Mara started a lower dose of her medication. According to Dr. Defel, if a seizure would reoccur it would most likely happen while being weaned off her prescription. It also meant the possible return of some or all of Mara's past memories. Luke desperately hoped Mara's first recollection wasn't of Palpatine giving her his last command. _'You will kill Luke Skywalker!'_

The doctor suggested reintroducing Mara to more of her co-workers and friends to see if this would jog her memory. Leia, of course, interpreted the doctor's comments as a decree to have an extravagant social event. Despite Luke's misgivings, Mara's exuberant reaction to the suggestion solidified the plan. Consequently Luke now found himself accompanying a seizure prone, ex-assassin, amnesiac to a social gathering comparable to a state function.

_'What could possibly go wrong.'_ He thought wearily.

.

.

"This is going to be fun," Mara exclaimed cheerfully as Luke escorted her to the private party room of the nightclub _Eclipse Ecstasy_. The nightspot was in an exclusive area of Coruscant with an award-winning restaurant on the main floor and a very chic dance club in the basement. Luke was sure his sister called in more than a few favors to secure that party location.

Leia had arranged for a wonderful dinner sparing no expense. Luke was seated next to Mara and his sister. Across from their table sat Talon, Lando, Wedge and Han. The rest of the room consisted of a number of Talon Karrde's employees, a handful of Rogues and their dates and a few members of the Jedi Academy that were on friendly terms with Mara.

Mara was still exhibiting her new personality, being very outgoing and jovial throughout the night. Despite the fact that she was on a half dose of her medication Luke could not detect any of Mara's old aloofness or personality quirks. Right about now Luke wished some of the old Mara would return. It was unsettling seeing how much she appeared to enjoy Lando's constant compliments and flirting.

He had hoped his discomfort was not noticeable, but when Lando excused himself to use the refresher Mara turned to the Jedi with a questioning look.

"What?" Luke asked.

"That is exactly what I was going to ask you," she said quietly.

Luke shrugged, "I don't know what you mean," he lied.

"I just was wondering why you dislike me talking to Lando so much." Mara asked.

"What gave you that idea," he whispered back, trying to rein in his volatile emotions.

"Oh, I don't know. Could it be the look of disgust that crosses your face whenever he says anything to me?" Mara stopped for a moment her gaze losing focus.

"Are you alright, Mara?" Luke asked anxiously.

Mara shook her head, trying to clear her thoughts. "Yes, I just got the strange burst of emotion. If was like it was coming from outside of me." She turned to Luke and gave him a curious look. "You're jealous, aren't you?"

Luke looked at her in shock. He thought his shields were firmly in place, but obviously Mara's use of the Force was returning. He panicked. What should he tell her? Finally he decided on the truth. "Yes," he confessed as he looked away, not wanting to see her reaction.

"Luke," Mara said softly, "it is just harmless flirting between Lando and me. I'm not interested in him." Luke turned to gaze into her beautiful emerald eyes. He smiled and gave a small sigh of relief.

"Don't worry, Luke," Mara continued, "I am not exactly sure what's between the two of you, but I would never interfere with any relationship you have."

"What?" Luke said dumbfounded. When he finally understood what she was referring to he was completely taken aback. "What!" he repeated.

A confused look crossed Mara's face. Now she was not sure of what she believed. "Ummm… I… I just thought," she mumbled flustered. "Well, I just thought that…you know with the outfits he wears…purple shirts, capes and such… and you are always staring at him and when you were over at his apartment he had his arm around you in the kitchen. Not that there is anything wrong with that." She looked up at Luke who had turned white with shock. "I thought wrong, didn't I?" She asked, thoroughly embarrassed.

"Mara, I don't think it's possible to be more wrong," he said a little louder than he intended. His sister stopped her conversation with Han and Wedge to look at her brother curiously. Luke reinforced his shields and gave his sister his most innocent smile. "Umm… Mara, would you like to go downstairs and dance?" He asked as he held out his hand for her.

Mara stared at his hand for a moment before she nodded her head slowly and grasped his hand. They stood and moved to the dance hall.

Once downstairs, Luke slipped his arms around Mara's slim waist. Mara responded by snaking her arms around his neck and then they slowly swayed to the sound of the slow music being played. Luke leaned closer and whispered into her ear. "So, you thought I was attracted to men?" The utter shock of the situation was finally fading and amusement was swiftly taking its place. Luke could not help but chuckle. "I can almost understand you thinking that about Lando, but why me?" He asked curiously.

Mara leaned back looking into his clear blue eyes. "I guess it was wishful thinking on my part," she confessed.

"Wishful thinking?" Luke sputtered, even more startled and confused by this admission than the last.

Mara shook her head, "It is not what you think." She leaned her head down on his shoulder relishing in the feel of his arms around her. "I just couldn't understand why you never responded to my obvious advances toward you. I don't think I could have been more blatant." She looked back into his eyes, "I just couldn't accept the fact that you were not attracted to me. I guess I just wanted to come up with a reason for your lack of interest. One that wasn't so painful."

Luke was shocked by her admission. "Mara, are you saying you are interested in me… romantically."

"Of course," she said tenderly. "I think I was attracted to you the first time I set eyes on you." She thought a moment and corrected herself. "Well, at least since the first time I saw you in the hospital. I don't know what I felt about you before the accident. I am trying so desperately to remember. I want to remember our past together. I would love to remember the first time we actually met. I don't want to forget the years I had you in my life."

"Oh Mara," Luke said as he swayed with her to the music. "I am extremely attracted to you and I would love to be more than friends, but you have to realize we have to wait until you are better. Otherwise if you didn't have any romantic feelings for me before the accident, your way of thinking might change when you regained your memory. You might not always feel this way about me."

Mara broke away from him and he could see tears of frustration in her eyes. "Then I don't want to remember" she said with conviction. "I am happy now. I am happy with you. Can you actually tell me I was a happy person before the accident…a really happy person?"

Luke wanted to tell her she was a happy and complete person prior to the accident, but he couldn't. He now saw how happy Mara could truly be and he had to admit he never really saw that before, at least not to this degree. Dr. Defel was correct; Mara had been carrying a lot of emotional baggage. Luke always admired Mara and her resilience, but deep down in his heart he knew the Emperor left a mark on her soul.

He gently coaxed her back into his arms and continued dancing. "Mara, you were probably not as happy as you are now. Your earlier life was difficult. It is much easier being happy when you have no bad memories to contend with, but you can't stay on the medication forever. It just isn't a medical option."

"I guess," Mara conceded reluctantly, "but if something in my past is preventing me from being with you…then I would rather live the remainder of my life without those memories."

Luke shook his head. "Mara you can't hide from your past, it is a part of you. Your childhood, adolescence, growing up to be the woman you are, it is what made Mara Jade, Mara Jade. They are part of you and I've always enjoyed seeing all parts of you and your life." Luke said warmly.

They danced silently. Neither knew what else to say; the seriousness the exchange made the moment awkward.

"Did you enjoy seeing the parts of me without panty lines?" Mara joked halfheartedly trying to soften the mood.

Luke smiled. "Yes, especially those," he teased back.


	12. Chapter 12

Despite the awkward start of their evening, the remainder of the night went well. Luke and Mara danced for hours at the party. Between songs Mara was able to reconnect with dozens of people at the dance—people who she hoped to one day recognize again. They all were friendly and appeared concerned about her welfare which brightened her mood.

"Would you like to go back home?" Luke asked as the party began to wind down and guests started to slowly file out.

Mara liked the way "home" sounded when Luke said it. It was like they really were a couple. Her feelings for him were growing stronger by the day and she didn't look forward to the time when her recovery was complete and she would have to return once again to her sparse apartment.

"Yes, I am getting a bit tired," Mara admitted. "I just need to use the 'fresher before we go."

"I'll wait for you out here," Luke offered as Mara smiled and made her way to the lady's room.

When she walked into the 'fresher she was immediately impressed by its size and grandeur. The entrance area consisted of a large sitting room with chairs and an ornate couch. Along the back wall was a huge multi-sink countertop that she recognized to be made out of expensive Corellian stone.

There was an entryway to another room where she assumed the facilities were actually located. She started to make her way to that area when voices coming from the location made her stop in her tracks.

In the back room two or three women were talking and Mara heard her name mentioned. She strained to identify the speakers, but she wasn't sure, although she was fairly certain they were girlfriends of some of the Rogue pilots that attended the party. Mara did not want to eavesdrop, but she couldn't resist the temptation.

"I cannot believe the difference in Mara," One woman said with a surprised tone in her voice. "I am not complaining, I love the new Mara, but it is just unnerving to see her smile and laugh all the time. It is so out of character. And have you seen how she is all over Luke?"

That prompted a laugh from a second woman whose voice Mara couldn't identify. "I bet the Jedi Master loves that. He's had eyes for her for years. I can't believe Mara never jumped at a chance to be with him."

"I would definitely do him," A third voice rang in and then all of three laughed.

"I liked and admired Mara before," the first woman continued, "but she was always so…distant and reserved all the time. I feel sorry for Luke if she returns to the way she was. They both seem so happy together now. It is a shame that they never could really connect with each other before."

"I always thought they would make a good couple. It was obvious that Luke wanted more, It's too bad Mara never came around to his way of thinking," the second woman commented. "I bet they would have been married by now if she gave him a chance."

"Yeah, and he never would have ever hooked up with the body snatcher," the third woman chuckled.

"Eww!" All three said in unison.

"Don't talk about the Force reanimated corpse please," the second woman complained.

"Sorry about that," the third woman laughed. "Well if Mara pushes him away again I'll volunteer to polish his lightsaber."

"Oh please, he's way out of your league," the first woman chided her friend, "I just hope Luke doesn't get his heart broken when she returns to being her normal self."

At that point Mara heard one 'fresher unit flush. She quickly backed out of the room and returned to Luke.

"I am ready to go," she said flustered as she nervously looked to the 'fresher door. She really didn't want to see who was talking or for them to see her. She just wanted to get back to the apartment.

"Are you alright?" Luke asked sensing her discomfort.

"Yes, I'm fine," she assured him.

They started walking to the exit, but Luke continued to glance down at her with a look of concern.

"Really Mara, I can feel you are upset about something."

Mara wanted time to think about what she heard, but she knew he would not let up until she told him something. So as they walked out of the hotel she said the first thing that popped into her head. "Who's the body snatcher?"

Luke paled and shook his head slightly. "I'll tell you when we get back home,"

.

.

Luke hoped Mara would have forgotten the question by the time they arrived at the apartment or she would be too tired to hear the story. But, he had no such luck. He ended up explaining to her about his experiences on the _Eye of Palpatine_ and how the Force allowed the spirit of Callista to enter the body of Cray Mingla who wanted to die to be reunited with her lost love.

Mara starred at Luke skeptically after he finished his story. "Quit joking!" She said irritated.

"What I told you is true." Luke assured her.

Mara crossed her arms across her chest and glared at him. "So you are telling me a Jedi from before you were born died on a battle station, but transferred her spirit into a computer. 30 years later, you and a Jedi Academy student show up and you fall in love with the disembodied voice of this dead woman." She paused to let Luke correct her, but when he didn't she shook her head in disbelief and then continued. "Your student becomes suicidal and allows the spirit of this ancient Jedi to take over her body so you two can be together. Is that what you want me to believe?"

"Yes, it's all true."

Luke thought it was a touching love story, but Mara just shivered and said "Gross, you had sex with one of your dead students!"

"Mara that isn't true, well, technically it may be true, but…" Luke trailed off not knowing what to say.

"And this Callista was decades older than you, Luke!" Mara hesitated in thought and then started laughing hysterically.

"What's so funny Mara?" Luke said guardedly.

She tried to tell him a couple times through her fits of laughter but was unsuccessful. Finally her laughing subsided enough for her to shout out "She was a cradle robber and you were a grave robber." She then burst out in laughter again.

"Mara, that's not fair." Luke protested.

"It's a good thing your Jedi student wasn't a Gamorrean." This got Mara laughing again.

"Mara, please," Luke pleaded for an end to the ribbing.

"Callista's lucky that the battle station computer didn't have virus protection software!"

"Mara, it's not funny!"

Mara finally stopped laughing and her mood became more somber. "Yeah, I know. Not much of this is funny." She rubbed her eyes and then stared at the floor for a moment in thought.

"I'm tired," she finally said. "We can talk about your necrophilia propensities in the morning."

"Mara!" Luke moaned frustrated.

But Mara had already disappeared into her room.

.

.

The next morning Luke went to the 'fresher to prepare Mara's medication, but when he opened the cabinet it was nowhere to be found. He checked the other drawers, but all the medication was gone.

Confused he went to Mara's room and knocked. "Mara, do you have the meds?"

There was silence for a moment, but then she answered. "Yes, but I can administer my own medication."

Luke's frowned. Something was not right. "Mara, open the door." There was no response. "Mara, are you messing with your dosage? Mara!" He yelled again and slammed his fist against the door frustrated. He used the Force to override the lock and stepped in. Mara was closing her closet as he entered.

"Give the medication to me," Luke said sternly. He walked toward the closet to retrieve the missing drugs, but Mara blocked his way. "Go away, I know what I am doing." Mara announced matter-of-factly.

"Mara, long term use of that medication can cause serious side effects. It is only supposed to be used if you continue to have seizures. Now give it to me."

Mara refused to budge. Luke was not going to let Mara get her way in this dispute, he moved to brush past her but she pushed him away and stood her ground, blocking the closet. "Mara, don't do this. It's not good for your health and I don't want to accidently hurt you while trying to retrieve your medication."

"I am not going back to the way I was, Luke," Mara yelled out in frustration and anger.

"Mara, you don't even remember the way you were! And even if you did, you have no choice in this matter!" Luke said as he circled around the woman trying to get to the closet, but she kept pushing him away. "Mara, this is insane. If you keep on a full dose you are going to run out of the medication quicker. Then you will have no medication at all. Dr. Defel said you have to be weaned off the drug slowly or more seizures could occur."

Mara glared at the Jedi. "That would be fine with me. Another seizure means another prescription! I am not getting off the medication!"

"For Force-sake, why not!" Luke was exasperated by her irrational behavior. "Why would you want to risk your life in this way?" Luke begged Mara for an answer. "Why don't you want to get your old life back?"

"Because I love you!" She cried out in anguish.

Luke stopped trying to get to the closet and stared back at Mara in shock. "What did you say?" Luke knew she wanted a romantic relationship with him, but he never guessed the depth of her feelings.

Mara cast her eyes down shyly. "I love you Luke and I don't want that to ever change."

Luke was stunned and deeply touched by Mara's admission. "Mara," Luke said softly as he wrapped her in his warm embrace. "Things might not change when your memory returns." He looked into her eyes with a tender expression. "Neither one of us really knows how you felt about me before the accident. You may have wanted a relationship even back then."

Mara pulled back from him. "No, I heard people talking at the party. They said I was cold toward you, that you wanted a relationship with me for years and I ignored you. Is it true?"

Luke looked down at his feet nervously. "Mara, we had a very complex relationship."

"Is it true!" she yelled.

"Yes, it's true," he finally admitted. "I was attracted to you for years. I kept trying to get you to the academy so you could train, but also because I wanted to be with you, but you never seemed interested in me that way."

"Do you see why I don't want to recover the memories? Why I want things to remain the same? I love you and the thought of losing this feeling of love is killing me!" Tears started to form in her eyes, but she made no attempt to hide her despair.

Luke went over to her bed in a daze and sat down. "Mara, I can't be with you this way. I would feel like you only wanted to be me because your mind was addled by drugs." He shook his head. "I just won't do it. You have to get off the medication like the doctor ordered." He looked at her sadly. "The Mara I was attracted to wouldn't take the easy way out. That is what I always admired about you. If your feelings for me are this intense, they will be there after your memories return."

He could see she didn't have the same optimism as he had.

"Give me the medication Mara."

Mara let her head fall in defeat. Slowly she went to the closet and retrieved a small container from its hiding place. She went over to Luke and handed him the medication.

Luke inventoried the contents ensuring it was all accounted for. "Did you take a full dose today?" He asked.

She shook her head, "No, I was about to when you burst in."

Luke took out the medication hypospray, dialed it to a half dose and injected her.

"It will be alright Mara." He promised.

She only nodded mutely as tears flowed from her eyes.

Luke went to return the medication to the 'fresher, but Mara's hand pulled him back. "Luke, before I start getting my memories back, I would like one thing first."

"Anything." Luke agreed quickly.

Luke was startled when Mara wrapped her arms around him, stood on her toes and brought her mouth to his lips. Luke resisted for a moment remembering his promise to himself, but then gave in and returned her kiss with equal passion. It seemed like minutes before they broke apart breathlessly.

"That was just in case I regain my memories tomorrow." Mara explained. "I wanted to know how it felt to kiss you."

Luke could see the sorrow and anxiety in her eyes. He knew exactly what she felt, he also feared for their future. He rubbed a finger along her cheek and wiped away the tears, then lifted her chin up as he gave her another kiss, this one soft and lingering and full of promise.

Luke smiled. "It won't be our last kiss," he promised.

"How do you know?" She asked.

"Because I love you too," he replied softly.


	13. Chapter 13

**_Mara looked around the dark and dank room. It was a fortress with dark thick stone walls and large arched entranceways. The air was thick with the smell of spice and the wretched body odor of the dozens of humans and assorted aliens who could be found laying about the main room in various stages of consciences. They were ruthless group of criminals and lowlifes—slythmongers, bounty hunters, Gamorrean guards, pleasure slaves and even a Mandalorian. Mara stepped over a Twi'lek female lying face down on the marble floor, her lekku sprawled around her. In her hand was an empty death stick tube. Mara noticed she was still breathing, but she didn't care. If they all overdosed on spice the galaxy would be a better place._ **

**She came around the corner and she could finally see the focal point of the palace; a massive, repulsive and foul-smelling Hutt. She had been staked out at Jabba's Palace for over a week with the hope of spotting her target. When the Wookiee and the female rebel leader were captured Mara was sure she would get her kill and be gone from this vile fortress in short order, but so far no such luck. She thought if she had to dance for the enjoyment of this pack of miscreants one more time she would pull out her holdout blaster and murder the entire crew.**

**She heard a noise coming from the front entrance of the palace. It was the groan of the colossal stone doors opening. Within moments she noticed somebody entering the main chamber. An irritating golden protocol droid next to Jabba started chattering about something. She pulled back into a dark corner to watch events unfold.**

**The figure removed the hood of his cloak and said to the Hutt something that sounded like "You will bring Captain Solo and the Wookiee to me." The room was dark, but Mara quickly recognized the profile of her target. At that moment a deep rage filled her. This was Luke Skywalker the man she wanted dead! The anger built up in her until it became a burning rage and all she could think about was killing Luke Skywalker.**

Mara woke from her dream gasping. She could still feel the anger course through her, washing over her in waves. What had she just experienced? Was it a dream? Or was her memory coming back?

Mara was startled when Luke rushed into her room looking alarmed. The Jedi apparently sensed her fright through the Force and made a mad dash to her bedchamber without taking the time to dress. He was only wearing a pair of grey boxer briefs and his hair was a disheveled mess. For a few brief seconds Mara caught herself admiring his firm body. Her eyes drifted from his chest to his well-toned abs then down to his shorts. She caught herself wondering what the thin fabric concealed—until the memory of her hate and loathing for him extinguished that thought like a cold shower.

"Mara what's wrong?" Luke asked his voice tinged with panic. He hurried to her bedside and tried to reach out to her, but Mara recoiled away from him.

Mara looked around the room still disorientated from waking up so suddenly, but eventually the events of the last few weeks returned to her.

"I had a nightmare," Mara said hesitantly.

"Go on, it might be a memory." Luke encouraged her to continue.

"No," Mara shook her head. "It was a dream, I can't remember it now." She lied. She was shaken and confused and not sure what was going on. She was no longer certain she was among friends…despite her previous declaration of love towards this man.

Mara pulled the bedsheets around her a little tighter and closed her eyes for a moment trying to calm down. "Luke, it was just a dream." She looked over at her chrono. "Luke, it is still the middle of the night, I just want to go back to bed."

Luke stared at her for a moment longer. Mara felt that pushing sensation on her brain again and she was sure he was trying to assess her condition through the Force. She didn't need a headache on top of a nightmarish dream or memory. "Get out of my head Skywalker!" She said sharply and then immediately felt contrite seeing the hurt in Luke's eyes.

"Sorry Mara, I am just concerned for your health." He said softly.

Mara shook her head slowly, "I know Luke. I'm just tired and roused out of a deep sleep from some nightmare. I'm just not myself right now. Please go back to bed." She beseeched him.

"Sure Mara," Luke turned and moved toward the door. He glanced back at her one more time apprehensively before he quietly exited.

Mara let out a sigh of relief. She needed time to think. She didn't believe what she experienced was a dream. She still recalled every detail of her night terror and even more details continued to emerge.

She remembered trying to get on the Hutt's sail barge, but she was refused passage. Luke, Han, and a Wookiee were loaded aboard a small, open top shuttle surrounded by guards. They were on their way to the Zarlac pit to die. Mara stopped and thought about the guards again. One of them was Calrissian! No wonder Luke got away. It was an inside job!

She laid back down in bed again trying to fall asleep, but couldn't. If it was a memory and not a dream what could have Luke done to possibly make her hate him that badly? It must have been something awful if she despised him that much in the past.

She wondered if anything that had been told to her in the last few weeks was true. Did she really become friends and fall in love with the man she at one time wanted to kill? He had told her they were on opposite sides during the war and she actually worked closely with the Emperor…an emperor that Luke helped to depose. Was she captured by Luke and his friends?

She shook her head. No, that couldn't be right. There was no sign of conflict on Coruscant and she had full access to the HoloNet…well, most of the channels were accessible. She noticed Luke blocked some networks.

Absolutely nothing made sense to her at the moment. She wasn't sure what to do. She had to remember more before she made her move. Until then she was not going to let on that her memory was returning. She didn't want to give Skywalker any advanced warning if it turned out she had to flee from this man she thought she loved. She laid in bed thinking about her options when sleep finally overtook her.

.

.

Mara woke late that morning a bit dazed. She lay in bed, trying to make sense of the images floating through her mind. Not only did she remember everything in her dream last night, but there were other snippets of memories perched at the forefront of her brain. She remembered working with Karrde. At least that part of the story Luke told her was true. But that tale about her rescuing him in deep space wasn't entirely accurate. The crew of the Wild Karrde captured Luke.

She closed her eyes and tried to concentrate. Fuzzy recollections of her previous life came back to her slowly. She recalled sitting in a chair watching Luke sleep. As his eyes flickered open she felt that same disdain for him as she did in the last night's vision. _'Finally awake are you? That's right…welcome back to the world of the living,'_ she had said to him, her tone dripping with contempt.

Other images emerged. She was holding a blaster on him as he entered a crashed ship she was in. Another memory had her poking a blaster into his ribs as they lay on the forest floor of some unknown planet. She couldn't help but notice that Luke was never threatening her in any of these memories.

Suddenly a strong and clear recollection came bursting into her conscious making her jerk upright in bed in shock. It was a horrifying memory of her plunging a lightsaber through Luke's chest as a loud cruel voice rang out in her head, **' _You will kill Luke Skywalker!'_**

"Sithspit!" Mara swore as she jumped out of bed and quickly threw on one of her old flight suits, not sure where she was going or what she was going to do.

Once again, Luke must have sensed her fear because moments later he gave a quick perfunctory knock on her door before he came bursting into her room—this time,though, he had the forethought to dress first.

"Mara, what's wrong? You are projecting panic like a beacon through the Force. Don't tell me it is nothing."

He came up to her, arms open and Mara just reacted. She grabbed his arm, twisting it around his back and then she snaked her free arm around his neck in a choke hold.

"I hated you!" Mara screamed. "I killed you!"

At that point Mara hesitated. If she killed him, how is he here with her now? She doubted all the bacta in the galaxy could fix a lightsaber wound through the heart. "Wait, how can you be here if I killed you?" Now Mara was completely confused. Were these real memories?

To her surprise, he didn't try to throw her off or escape. Luke simply turned his head slightly and tucked his chin into the crook of her elbow so he would have some room to breathe. Mara thought she heard him choking, but no, he wasn't choking he was chuckling! In fact it looked like he was smiling.

"Mara," he said, his voice a little strained from the pressure on his neck. "You are getting your memory back. That's great!"

She was taken aback a bit. He sounded happy.

"Mara please, let's sit down and talk about this," Luke begged. "I know you are confused, but believe me, if anybody wanted to hurt you it would have happened weeks ago. Please let the memories return without overreacting."

Luke paused for a moment and then continued. "You said you wanted a relationship with me. Now you know why I didn't let that happen. We have a long and complicated history together, but please believe me when I tell you…you are my friend and I love you."

Mara loosened her grip on him. She thought of the happy times she had these last few weeks, especially yesterday's kiss…that resonated with her strongly. She could still remember the taste of his lips, the clean smell of his aftershave and the incredible passion she felt the moment of contact.

But those wonderful memories were now overshadowed by these angry and bitter thoughts that kept resurfacing in her mind. Shavit! She told him she didn't want to remember. Why did she have to get off the medication! She was happy without the memories.

But the memories were coming back. She desperately wanted to feel the love and happiness she had since she woke up in the hospital and she feared these images of the past were going to tear apart any chance of happiness in the future.

She released Luke and sat down on the edge of her bed dejected.

Luke rubbed his neck but then cautiously moved over toward her and sat at the end of her bed about an arm's length from her.

"I am so angry in my memories," Mara said miserably. "I don't like that person. I don't want to remember." She leaned over and cradled her head in her hands.

"Mara, those memories that are coming back happened a long time ago. In the years prior to the accident we became close friends; you weren't that angry person you're remembering now."

"Why didn't you tell me!" She screamed as she gave him a frustrated backhanded smack across his chest. "You should have warned me that I wanted to kill you, Luke. What did you do to make me hate you so much?"

She stared at the man that yesterday she loved. She wasn't sure what she felt now. The love was still there, but it was being smothered by other more disturbing feelings of anxiety and hate.

"I didn't do anything to you Mara. I've never hurt you. You hated me because of the Emperor. He filled your mind with lies about me. He wanted me dead as revenge for my father betraying him. When we finally met, you eventually realized you were lied to." Luke explained.

Luke slid a little closer to her and put a hand on her shoulder. "Mara, I'm sorry that I didn't tell you."

Mara looked at him incredulously. "Your sorry! What in the Nine Corellian Hells were you thinking? I should've gotten a heads up that I would soon have a drukload of horrific memories to contend with!" She squeezed the bridge of her nose in frustration.

"You let me fall in love with you, knowing that our past was…well, I am not sure about what exactly happened in our past, but it obviously was bad enough to keep us apart for years and it is probably going to prevent us being together now." Tears started flowing as she spoke to the Jedi.

"You let me fall in love with you!" She repeated accusingly. "What's going to happen now? I have to live with these conflicting emotions of love and hate? A day a go I was happy and begging you to let me stay on the medication. Now I'm miserable. I loved you, but now I feel I am losing everything!"

"Please Mara, the love we share doesn't have to go away. We can make this work out between us if you want." Luke hesitated, "if that is still what you want."

Mara scoffed as she shook her head. "What I want is not to remember. I can't believe the things that I have seen and did…" she looked at him cocking her head in confusion, "And why aren't you dead? I killed you?"

Despite the intense emotional situation, Luke couldn't help but chuckle, "You killed a clone of me, Mara."

Mara gave him a skeptical look. "Who would clone you? A body snatching girlfriend?"

Luke smirked, "No, a crazed clone of an ancient Jedi Knight who acquired my genetic material from my severed hand which was recovered shortly after my Sith Lord father chopped it off."

Mara stood up angry. "If you are not going to be serious about this I am out of here." She spat out as she started walking toward the door.

Luke laughed as he got up off the bed and grabbed her hand pulling her toward him. She fought him for a few seconds, but then relaxed into his warm embrace. "Mara, I probably have had the most complicated life of anybody in this galaxy, with the exception of maybe you. Believe me, when all your memories come back you will realize I'm telling you the truth."

Mara pushed him away. "What I do know is you were deceptive when discussing my past. You told me only good things. Why couldn't you warn me about this impending flood of emotion and the fact that I killed someone with a lightsaber? And that voice in my head…that evil voice…" She paused for a moment in deep thought and then her eyes went wide, "Oh Sith, I'm schizophrenic, aren't I?"

"What?" Luke stammered taken off guard by her train of thought. "No, no Mara," he assured her. "You are Force sensitive. The Emperor could communicate with you mentally. You could hear his voice in your head."

Mara closed her eyes and tried to concentrate. There were so many thoughts returning. It was as if her brain was doing a memory dump on her. It would take time to detangle all the images.

"Don't you think _that_ was something you should've told me?"

Luke looked down embarrassed. "I just couldn't tell you the truth. You were so happy not knowing about your past."

"Not knowing what exactly?" She glared at Luke, "what precisely was my relationship to the Emperor?" Mara asked through gritted teeth.

Luke hesitated for a moment, "Your title was 'The Emperor's Hand'…you were his assassin."

The air rushed out of her lungs as she felt the strength ebb from her legs. Luke quickly grabbed her back into his arms, steadying her. She looked into his blue eyes sadly. "You should have let me stay on the medication."

"Mara, you have to believe me what you are remembering is far in our past. You are no longer under the Emperor's control. You are not an assassin anymore. You stopped hating me years ago. We became friends and in the last few weeks we fell in love." Luke whispered desperately, "Mara, please wait for the good memories…please. You have to believe me."

"I don't know what to believe," her voice sounded numb and distant.

"Mara," Luke hugged her gently resting his head against hers. "Do you remember our kiss?"

She closed her eyes and nodded, "I remember."

"Try to hold on to that memory until you recall more recent events," Luke begged. "Please don't act until you remember the happier times."

"I don't know if I can stay here with you," Mara said softly, "maybe I should go somewhere else until I can sort this all out."

"Oh Mara," Luke gave a heartbreaking moan. "Mara, I never want to leave your side, but if you are uncomfortable staying with me, I'll call Karrde to come get you," Luke offered. "You shouldn't have conflicting memories or feelings about him. He's your friend." Luke waited for her answer anxiously hoping she wouldn't go.

Mara wanted to leave. She felt so confused.

She looked up at the Jedi and she could see the love and concern in his clear blue eyes. Once again she sensed a feeling of warmth and security radiating from him. He was the cause of her anxiety, but the thought of being away from him caused her more distress. Finally she let the new memories win out and she leaned her head on Luke's shoulder. "No, I believe you when you say we were friends." Tears rolled down her cheeks. "This is killing me. I want to love and feel loved again." Mara shook her head. "I desperately want those feelings back and unsoiled by these horrible memories."

Luke held her tight. They both stood in their embrace for a very long time clutching at each other desperately. As long as she had physical contact with him her fear was diminished. She was afraid if she let go he would be lost to her forever.

"Mara, no matter what, I will be your friend," Luke assured her. "Take as much time you need to get your thoughts together. You absolutely don't have to decide anything now…. especially when it comes to being in a relationship. I will be here in a week, a month or a year. If you ever decide you want more from our relationship. I will be here."

"Part of me desperately wants to be with you. But I now don't know if I can go through with it. This is a lot more than I expected Luke. I don't know if I can do it."

"We don't have to do it alone, Mara." Luke said quietly as he caressed her hair letting his hand trail down her spine until it rested at the small of her back.

Mara gave him a weak smile. A few days ago she would be thrilled to be in his arms and feel his touch, but now part of her wanted nothing more than to get into her ship and blast off to somewhere far, far away.

She pulled away from him slightly so she could look into his eyes. "What do mean when you say we don't have to do this alone?" she asked.

Luke smiled, "I think we should go to a professional…we should go to couple's counseling".

Mara lifted an eyebrow in surprise. She tried to formulate a snarky response, but the only word that came out of her mouth was, "Go do what?"


	14. Chapter 14

Mara broke away from the Jedi. "Oh no, no, no, no, I'm not going to see a therapist,"

"Why not, Mara?"

Mara knitted her brow from a moment. "I don't know why, but I have an aversion to counselors…I think." There was a memory of her past that she could almost grasp concerning psychologists or psychiatrists, but she couldn't quite pull it out of the tangle of images spilling back into her brain. She shook her head to clear her thoughts. "It doesn't matter, we can't go to couple's therapy because we're _not_ a couple."

"True," Luke admitted, "but we want to be a couple…or at least I do."

"This is crazy!" Mara said hotly as she started pacing the room nervously. "Yesterday we were in love and today part of me hates you with a passion." She stopped to glare at him. "If you had taken the last month to sit me down and prepare me for this I wouldn't be this upset." She punctuated the last few words by poking her finger into his chest.

"I'm sorry," He uttered apologetically. "You're right, I should have prepared you for what was coming."

"Damn right you should have!" She shouted back.

He could sense the anger rise in Mara as she continued circling around the room in a highly agitated state. Luke frowned when he noticed her right hand was shaking almost uncontrollably. Luke had seen that type tremor before during the Rebellion. Some of the pilots of his old squadron would exhibit hand trembling after a particular horrific space battle. It was a sign of severe stress.

"Have you any clue what it is like to wake up and suddenly realize you have murdered people in your past and you hate the man you declared your love for the day before!" Mara continued infuriated. "What were you thinking? If you really loved me you would either have let me stay on the medication or prepare me for what I would remember!"

She was building up into a rage and Luke was getting worried that a seizure could reoccur if she didn't calm down soon, but he was temporarily at a loss as to how he could soothe the fiery redhead.

When Mara paced by him again he made a sudden and brash decision. He unceremoniously grabbed her in a firm embrace and kissed her.

Luke could feel the shock projecting off of Mara. She tried to protest, but with his mouth over hers it made difficult to voice her objection. She made a symbolic show of resistance by trying to push Luke away, but the effort was minimal and within seconds stopped all together as she reached around his waist and pulled him closer. He deepened the kiss and his Force senses soared from her touch. He knew he was taking a big risk, but Mara was worth it.

Eventually he could feel her trembling subside and woman in his arms calmed down to the point where he thought he might live through the day if he released her.

He gently broke off the kiss and stepped back to look at Mara and accept the consequences of his actions.

To his surprise Mara didn't lash out. Her eyes were wide and she simply stared at Luke with a bewildered look on her face. Finally her voice returned, albeit shaky, "what did you do that for?"

Luke smiled weakly, "You were becoming overwrought. I needed to distract you. I figured I could either slap you or kiss you…I thought I had a better chance of survival with the latter."

Mara sat back down on her bed and rubbed her hand over her face. "If what I remember is correct, I would say your odds were about equal. You like to live dangerously, don't you?"

"Haven't I always?" Luke smiled.

Mara turned to look at him. "I don't know, all I remember is I wanted to kill you, but for some reason I never took the shot."

"For that I am truly grateful."

"Fierfek!" Mara cursed, "What in the worlds are we going to do about this?"

"I told you what I thought would help," Luke replied. "Think about it."

She shook her head. "I don't know…I would need to remember more before I even consider a counselor." Mara countered.

"Fair enough," Luke said. "Mara, we probably should arrange another appointment with Dr. Defel. It looks like the abrupt return of your memories many be causing you more anxiety than we anticipated."

Mara simply nodded her agreement while taking deep calming breaths. Luke was pretty sure she just experienced a full-blown panic attack.

"Come on," Luke said softly, "I just finished preparing breakfast before you woke up. We'll eat and I will tell you everything and answer all of your questions."

Mara looked like she was going to refuse, but then her stomach started to rumble. "Okay, but you better tell me the complete truth this time. No sugarcoating my past!" Mara warned him.

"You have my promise," Luke agreed as he let her out of her bedroom and to the breakfast table.

He had prepared a Gartro egg omelet with mushrooms and Ojomian onions. Luke held out Mara's chair and helped her be seated and then took a seat across from her.

Mara looked at the food he prepared and smiled tentatively. "Thank you, it looks wonderful."

Luke smiled. "You're welcome, dig in, it's probably getting cold."

Mara cut off a piece of omelet with the side of her fork and then gave it a taste. "This is good," she said quietly. Despite the fact that she just woke up, she sounded exhausted.

"I'm glad you like it." Luke hesitated for a moment. "I guess I should start from the beginning. You were trained by the Emperor to be an assassin, but also to act as an extension of his eyes and ears. He was able to communicate with you telepathically all away across the galaxy."

"How did I end up with the Emperor?" Mara inquired between bites. "Was he my father?"

Luke almost choked on a mushroom. "Force, I hope not."

Mara gave him an inquisitive look.

"He was an awful person Mara," Luke emphasized, "you watched _'The Death of the Empire'_ "

Mara frowned, "Sure, I watched the movie, but I thought the Emperor was more like a caricature of the real thing…after all the actor playing Luke Skywalker wasn't anything like you."

"Should I take offense to that comment?"

"I just mean he was more cocky and brash…and much bigger. I thought the Emperor was also exaggerated"

Luke glowered at Mara, "My master Yoda always told me 'size matters not'."

Mara rolled her eyes, "Let me guess, Yoda was a guy."

Luke wasn't going to be pulled into that type of particular conversation. He chewed on his food silently for a moment. "What I am trying to say is the Emperor was just as bad in real life as in the holofilm."

Mara shuddered. "Ack, that's a disturbing thought, in the movie Palpatine's face looked like a Thanu's butt."

Luke coughed up the water he was drinking. "Mara!"

"Well he did look awful. Why would I work for such an horrible person?" Mara asked.

"I don't think you had a choice. I believe you were taken from your parents as a child and brought to the Emperor because of your Force abilities."

"We don't know what happened to my family?" She asked sadly.

Luke shook his head. "You never could find out anything about them."

Mara looked down at her plate gloomily. "Go on," she finally said.

"Leia already told you Darth Vader was our father, right."

Mara nodded her head while chewing on food and signaled for him to continue.

"Well, our father was the Emperor's apprentice." Luke paused, "This story is way too long. I think there are a couple documentaries you could watch to help you get a better idea of what happened. To make a long story short, my father captures me and brings me to the Death Star to face the Emperor."

"I don't remember that part in the movie," Mara interjected, "didn't you blow up the Death Star?"

"That was the first one." Luke clarified. "There were two."

"Two? Holy Sith, the Emperor must have had one hell of a line of credit."

"He had the whole galaxy to plunder," Luke commented dryly, "anyway the Emperor tried to kill me with Force lightning, and at the last minute my father turns from the Dark Side and saves my life by throwing the Emperor down a reactor core shaft."

"What were you guys doing near a reactor core shaft?" Mara asked.

"It was in the Emperor's throne room." Luke explained.

Mara put down her fork and looked at Luke incredulously. "The Emperor had a reactor core shaft in his throne room? What? Did a brain-dead Gungan design this station? Who would design a throne room with a reactor core shaft running through it?"

Luke shrugged his shoulders, "I guess the same person who would design a moon-size battle station with thousands of turbo blasters and not bother to put a metal grate over a small thermal exhaust port."

"Oh, I remember that in the movie," Mara smirked. _"I used to bulls-eye womp rats back home,"_ Mara said in a mocking, slightly whiny, Luke Skywalker voice. "You do know killing small animals for sport is a sign of mental illness."

"So is kissing a former assassin while she is having a full-blown anxiety attack." Luke countered.

Mara scowled at him, "I wasn't having an anxiety attack! And you're lucky I didn't have my lightsaber. I don't like being manhandled."

Luke made a snorting sound, "Mara, you may not realize it, but your ability to shield your emotions through the Force has been severely hindered. You liked it just fine."

Mara turned red in embarrassment and glared daggers at the Jedi. "Why you conceited, rimworld, piece of Dianoga Dung! No wonder we never dated."

"I am just telling you what I felt through the Force." Luke said honestly, " and yes we may have never dated, but we were good friends. Other than maybe my sister and Han, you were my best friend."

"If we were best friends, why didn't we become more than that?" Mara queried Luke.

Luke could only shrug his shoulders. "I think you hated me for so long that it was hard to move in the other direction. When we finally got to the point where we were good friends, neither one of us wanted to risk the next step."

"So how _did_ I ended up hating you." Mara asked Luke.

"Well, I think it started when the Emperor sent you to kill me at Jabba's Palace. You once told me that he portrayed me as a monster and enemy of the Empire." Luke paused to drink some water. "Later, right before his death, he gave you his last command through the Force. It was an order to kill me. He also projected to you a false image of what happened. He made it look like my Father and I turned on him and killed him together."

Luke took another bite of egg before continuing the story. "After the death of the Emperor you lost everything and all that remained was the Emperor's voice reverberating through your mind constantly. You hated me for supposedly killing your Master, for ending your position in the Empire, and because as long as I was alive the Emperor would continue to torment you from beyond the grave. The voice in your head didn't stop until you finally killed my clone."

Mara sat back in her chair. "You weren't kidding when you said we had a complicated relationship." She closed her eyes in thought. "I remember a lot of what you told me. It is slowly coming back."

She massaged her temples and frowned. "I'm getting a headache from all these images and conflicting emotions. I think I will take some headache medication and lay down. Thank you for breakfast."

She stood and cleared her dish from the table. "Luke, go ahead and make what appointments you think I need. Dr. Defel or a therapist." She hesitated, "I think you're right. We can't do this alone."

.

.

A couple days later, Luke and Mara sat nervously in a therapy waiting room. Dr. Defel recommended them to see a Dr. Sola Nidor because she was not only a licensed Doctor of Psychology and a successful couple's therapist, but she also specialized in disorders involving past trauma/stress and obsessive-compulsive difficulties.

After more and more memories returned to Mara she realized why Dr. Defel felt those particular areas of expertise might be needed. In fact, in the past few days Mara thought she might need a specialist in multiple personality disorders also.

Her memory re-emergence was strange, to say the least. It appeared that Mara's pre-accident personality hadn't quite merged and reconciled with her newest memories. There was a constant struggle between the two.

Mara found herself viewing her memories from before the accident with some disconnection. It was like she was watching a holothriller of another person's life. But she knew that wasn't true. She knew the redheaded child in her memory being tortured by Palpatine with Force lightning was her.

She suffered those past abuses and the Emperor was far from her only tormentor. There were also her trainers: weapons experts, hand-to-hand combat trainers, sniper instructors and worse of all lightsaber training with Vader. Her entire childhood was like a decade long shocktrooper emersion course.

And the one thing that was constantly stressed in every aspect of her training was detachment, detachment, detachment.

_'It isn't a sentient being you're killing, it's just a target,' _she remembers her trainers screaming at her. She couldn't have been older than ten years old at the time.

And now she is hoped to detach from her decades long training so she could continue loving this man sitting next to her.

She shook her head. _'This was going to be impossible,'_ Mara thought miserably.

"Hey," Luke said with concern in his voice. "We can do this." He reached over the armrest of his seat to give her hand a reassuring squeeze.

Mara could only smile at him weakly. "Sure," she whispered halfheartedly.

She now knew why she never started a relationship with Luke years ago. Her heart might have wanted to, but her defiant brain betrayed her and refused to let him break through the barriers she spent years putting up.

These were not weak barriers constructed from mild nervousness and unease, but instead built by torturous, obsessive thoughts that rolled through her mind like an endless loop. She was sure the compulsiveness of her thinking served her well in her job as an assassin, but it was of no help for a woman who wanted to start a new life and relationship. She was constantly bombarded with doubts, fear, suspicions and anxiety about trusting or caring for another person. To Mara, depending on others was a weakness.

The thoughts were pervasive. They wormed their way into her forethought constantly during every minute of every day. Only when she is completely preoccupied did she find some relief.

_'Like the day Luke kissed me,'_ she thought fondly. Just as soon as the thought flittered through her mind the old Mara fought back mentally, _'You can't spend the rest of your life in his arms just to get through the day!' s_ he silently fumed.

_'You could try,'_ a voice came back in her head. It took her a few seconds before she realized that thought wasn't coming from her.

"Get out of my head, Skywalker!" She spat. Luke tried to look contrite, but he wasn't quite pulling it off. Everyday her Force powers were returning and to her dismay she found that she and Luke could often pick up on each other's thoughts. Luke tried to teach her a shielding technique, but she hadn't quite mastered that particular skill yet.

"You know I hate it when you do that!" She admonished the Jedi.

"I am not doing it on purpose, you are just projecting," Luke defended himself.

Mara huffed and turned away from him and back to her thoughts.

She couldn't believe she was going to see a counselor. If somebody told her she would be doing this a couple months ago she would have that person committed to an asylum… but here she was. Mara came to therapy with Luke because she had one big advantage that she did not have months ago. She knew it was possible to be happy and to love. She experienced true happiness in the last few weeks, and like a spice addict she wanted that feeling again desperately. No matter how much the old Mara tried to make her see the futility of the situation, those happy memories drove her forward.

"Hello, I am Dr. Nidor," said a late-middle-aged woman from the office door, startling Mara out of her musings. The doctor smiled and came forward to shake Luke and Mara's hand. "I look forward to working with you two," the doctor said brightly.

Mara looked at her, slightly surprised by her appearance. She was expecting somebody like the Imperial psychoanalysts that she occasionally had to see as a child. They were cold and callous military doctors who appeared to enjoy antagonizing her. Of course, those medical experts were not there to make her life better, but to make sure she was mentally tough enough to fillet a human if she needed to. No, this doctor was different. She wore casual clothing, jewelry, a stylish braided hairstyle and appeared to be relaxed and outgoing.

"Thank you for seeing us so soon," Luke remarked politely as the doctor led them into a large office with various seats. Mara and Luke opted to sit together on a small couch.

Dr. Nidor sat across from them with an enthusiastic grin still on her face. "Master Skywalker, I must say, I was pleasantly surprised to have you recommended to see me…congratulations to both of you!"

Mara and Luke gave each other a puzzled look. Both turned to the doctor and said almost in unison, "For what?"

A confused look came across the therapists face, "Well, I assumed you were sent here for pre-marital counseling."

Luke looked a little shocked, but when Mara started laughing he chuckled also.

"No," he said. "We are not exactly to that point. It is more like pre-dating counseling."

Now it was the therapist's turn to look puzzled. "I'm sorry, but Dr. Defel didn't give me any details about your situation other than your request for couple's therapy. We need a reciprocal agreement signed by both of you to allow Dr. Defel and I to discuss patient information." She paused for a moment pursing her lips in thought. "Pre-dating counseling? I am afraid I never really experienced that in my career. Usually couples date and then run into issues they want to resolve."

"Well, Luke and I are not your usual couple," Mara said matter-of-factly. Luke smiled and shrugged his shoulders in agreement.

"I guess we should sign those reciprocal information forms because I think you'll definitely need to consult with Dr. Defel." Mara said with resignation, doubting if all the doctors in the world could help her.

"I will make sure you both have the paperwork before you leave. Maybe you should give me a quick synopsis of what is troubling you two."

'A quick synopsis' Mara snorted mentally. But before she could comment Luke decided to take a shot at it.

"Our problems all started with Emperor Palpatine," Luke began his story. Mara couldn't help but smirk. Luke's words sounded just like one of those preambles that would scroll across the holoprojector in the beginning of those old cliffhanger adventure holos.

Mara sat quietly as she listened to him chronicle her life. Luke soldiered on admirably telling the doctor all about their past, their adventures together, their problems, the amnesia and Mara's abrupt personality change, her desire to have a romantic relationship with Luke and Luke's refusal to go that route until her memory returned. And, just like Luke predicted, the return of Mara's memory resulted in her old defensive behaviors returning despite her continued desire to return to what she sometimes referred to as her post-accident _happy place_.

By the time Luke completed his story Mara felt she might now have the complete picture. She probably would never know for sure if her memories returned fully, but she fairly certain she had a somewhat complete picture of her life.

When Luke finished the therapist appeared to be at a loss of words. As she sat quietly, Mara worried that she was contemplating referring them to somebody else. Finally she spoke. "I would like to warn you that I have never worked a case anywhere similar to yours, but with that said let me assure you I have dealt with patients that had horrific emotional issues, to include infidelity, alcoholism, drug abuse, childhood abuse, dysfunctional families, depression, sexual abuse. Until today I used to say, 'I've seen it all', but after talking to you today I think I was a little premature with that claim."

She turned to Mara. "You know you cannot rid yourself of these memories, but we can try to not let them control your life and impede your happiness."

"That would be nice," Mara said unemotionally.

"Mara, I think you may be suffering from a disorder caused by extreme traumatic events. Some of the symptoms are hyper vigilance, compulsive thoughts, irritability, distancing yourself from others, explosive anger, a sense of despair or suicidal thoughts. Did you then or now experience any of these symptoms?"

Mara closed her eyes, not wanting to answer or wanting to lie, but she knew if she wanted a chance of a happy life she had to commit to 100% honesty.

"Yes," she finally admitted.

The doctor tapped some notes into her datapad. "Which symptoms apply to you exactly?"

Mara took in a deep breath and then let it out slowly, "All of them."


	15. Chapter 15

Mara's admission was an absolute shock to Luke. Mara always seemed so strong, never desperate or suicidal!

Mara turned to Luke, "Who's projecting now," Mara said wryly. "Don't worry Farmboy, I had thoughts that could be _misconstrued_ as suicidal," She tried to explain "but I never really contemplated harming myself. That would be a coward's way out and my training didn't allow that".

"What do you mean then, Mara?" the doctor asked.

"After the Emperor died I lost everything. I lost my Master, I lost my status, and I lost my home. I worked menial jobs and was disgusted with myself for not being able to get my old life back. You don't know how depressing it is to think your options in life have been taken away. I take that back, I had options but they all appeared abysmal. I couldn't fathom a way to get my old life back and I couldn't imagine how anything could possibly get better." She paused for a moment trying to collect her thoughts.

"I wasn't suicidal but sometimes I wished it would all end. I wished a meteorite would fall out of the sky and landed on my head. I knew I would return to the Force and maybe I would get another shot in another life."

Mara took a deep breath and then let it out slowly before continuing. "It's like when you are playing a hologame you're really good at. Suddenly you make a stupid move and now you know you will never beat your high score. There is no real reason to finish. So you shut off the game and start over in the hopes of a better result. That is what I meant by suicidal, but I never would hurt myself. I left it in the hands of the Force." Mara looked up at Luke. "Does that make sense?"

Luke nodded slowly. "Yes, after Yoda died I felt a little like that."

Doctor Nidor was rapidly typing notes into her datapad. "So Mara," the therapist said looking up, "do you still feel this way?"

Mara shook her head. "No, after I started working for my current employer I started to see it was possible to rebuild my life. I would never again be the Emperor's Hand. Life would be different, but that didn't mean it couldn't be better…I had one problem though."

"And what is that," Dr. Nidor inquired.

"At the time of the Emperor's death he placed a Force induced command into my head to kill Luke. I was tormented by the voice of the Emperor for years until with the help of Luke and a bizarre twist of fate,I was able to rid myself of the last command."

"Did that help you with your relationship with Luke?"

Mara nodded slightly. "I would say no longer having the Emperor's evil voice in my head nagging me to kill Luke helped tremendously, but it didn't end the feeling of anxiety and apprehension that I felt whenever I started to feel close to Luke."

The doctor looked up from her notes. "Tell me Mara, is it just Luke or have you been unable to form close bonds with others?"

"I have formed working relationships that I would consider close, such as with my employer Karrde. I have worked closely with others before, but in all of those situations I try to make sure that my life and well-being was in no way dependent on the actions of my co-workers.

"I see," the doctor said, "so letting a person get close to you is dangerous. If that person becomes too important in your life it means some of your control of your environment has passed on to them?"

"Yes, that's it," Mara appeared surprised that somebody understood. "Whenever I try to put myself into a vulnerable situation I get this strange feeling. My chest tightens, my heart beat speeds up, and I start feeling anxious. All I want to do is remove myself from the situation."

The doctor thought for a moment. "Mara, what you describe sounds like you are having panic or anxiety attacks when you start to give up some control in your life. There are many reasons that this could occur, but after hearing about your time with the Emperor I am wondering if you were purposely trained though classical or operant conditioning to have these feelings."

"Why would the Emperor want that?" Mara asked seriously.

"Well, it would be a way to keep you distant from others and dependent upon him. Detachment to other people also would mean it would be easier for you to kill." The doctor thought for a moment, "preventing you from establishing romantic relationships would also reduce the risk of you running off or any unplanned pregnancies."

Mara opened her mouth to say something, but then decided to not argue the point. "So if I was conditioned over years to avoid attachments, how do you cure this type of phobia?

"I will write up a recovery plan for you Mara," the doctor said, "there are two main ways to overcome this type of conditioning. One way is called Systematic Desensitization and the other is called Extreme Exposure Therapy. The first one is a slower process which can take weeks or months. In Systematic Desensitization you are gradually exposed to situations that would normally cause your conditioned response. Your body will eventually get used to the stimuli and stop the adverse reaction."

"You said weeks," Mara pointed out.

"Yes, it takes much longer, but it is less stressful. Extreme Exposure Therapy is when you are placed in a situation which would normally cause the phobic response and keep you in that situation until your body stops reacting adversely to the stimuli."

The doctor scrolled over her data pad. "Let's take the example of a person who has a fear of airspeeders. Using systematic desensitization we would first have the patient stand outside the speeder and just look at it. Later we would have the person touch the exterior of the speeder. The next session we may have the patient sit inside the speeder. We slowly increase the stimuli until the patient can comfortably ride in the vehicle."

"So what would be an example of Extreme Exposure Therapy?" Mara asked.

"We would force the patient into the backseat of the speeder and drive them around for hours. The patient would be hysterical at first, but eventually they realize they are not dying from the experience and calm down. I would highly suggest systematic desensitization, it is far less stressful. Give me some time and I think I can work up an appropriate plan for you to follow."

The doctor put down her datapad and looked at Mara directly. "Until then I would like to find out a little more about your situation, Mara. Which memories are bothering you the most and you believe are preventing you from establishing a relationship with Luke?"

"I have a lot of issues when it comes to Luke, but I would say probably mainly the memories from the time I was given the order to kill him and up to the point where he helped me rescue my friend Karrde from Grand Admiral Thrawn."

"What was it about Luke helping your friend that changed your feelings toward him?" Asked Dr. Nidor.

Mara raised an eyebrow. "Well, it could be the fact that after I told him repeatedly that I was going to kill him he trusted me enough to climb into an industrial size garbage masher I was in control of in order to save my friend".

"I see," the doctor remarked and then turned to Luke, "why did you trust her after she told you she wanted to kill you?"

Luke smiled slightly, "I could sense the conflicting emotions in Mara. I could see the light in her even back then."

Dr. Nidor thought for a moment. "Mara, how do you feel about Luke now?"

"I remember falling in love with him. I want to continue down that path, but I'm experiencing very conflicting emotions. Part of me is mortified at my behavior in the last few weeks. I look in my closet and say "What the kriff was I thinking when I bought this outfit?" And the way I acted with Luke is somewhat humiliating to me now."

The doctor cocked her head to the side confused. "The way you acted with Luke? Did you do something hurtful to him in the last few weeks?"

"Yes, if cold showers are hurtful." Luke snickered under his breath. That earned him a glare and a retaliatory smack on his arm from Mara.

The doctor looked to Luke and then to Mara, "I'm sorry, I didn't quite hear what Luke said."

"What Luke is trying to say is I was uncharacteristically friendly with him during the last few weeks." Mara explained.

"Oh, I must have misunderstood earlier," the doctor said as she sat back in her seat. "So are you saying that while living with Luke your relationship went from friends to lovers quickly without first establishing a proper relationship?"

"Not that friendly!" Mara corrected the doctor quickly. "We never dated prior to my accident, but while recovering at his home we kissed twice." Mara touched her lips remembering that moment. Would she ever experience such pleasure again?

"So you're conflicted now because of your past memories." The doctor clarified.

"Yes," Mara agreed. "Every time I think about having a relationship with Luke now, I get overwhelming sense of anxiety. My brain screams out that what I am attempting to do is dangerous and foolish and things would never work out. It is the same reaction I have had for years. Luke and I worked hard to become friends." Mara paused for a moment.

"I don't have many friends," Mara confessed. "I guess I don't want to risk what I have in order to experiment with a romantic relationship that I fear will fail, and will result in me losing my best friend."

Luke turned to her, "Mara you will never lose my friendship."

Mara held up her hand asking him to stop. "Luke, how many people have you met that can be lovers and then go back to being friends?" She asked.

"I'm sure it is possible," Luke countered.

"Okay, let's say we become a couple and it doesn't work out and we go back to being friends." Mara continued, "And then I start dating Lando. How would that affect our friendship?"

"Why Lando?" Luke asked suspiciously.

Mara rolled her eyes, "Luke I am just giving you a hypothetical situation."

"Is it hypothetical?" He asked.

"You really are jealous of him, aren't you?" Mara scoffed.

"How can I not worry about your ex-boyfriend?" Luke shot back.

"What made you think Lando and I ever dated?" Mara looked aghast at the proposition.

"You two were flying all over the galaxy making a good show as being a couple."

"The key word is 'show'," Mara bit out, "we were working undercover as a couple. He never got more than a peck on the cheek and that was only in order to keep up pretenses."

Luke let a small smile slip onto his face. "Really?"

"No, we had atom-splitting sex all the time, after all, you know what they say, _once you go Baron Administrator you never go back._ " Mara said sarcastically. "Of course nothing happened! Now answer my question. If I dated some guy, who, for argument sake is not Lando, how would it affect our friendship?"

Luke pondered the question for a moment. "I would be jealous. I also think if our romantic relationship didn't work I wouldn't be able to be around you for a while. The feelings would be too raw. I would probably hole up at the Academy."

"If you both are apprehensive about a relationship," the doctor interrupted, "Maybe it is best you don't pursue romance at this time."

"No!" Both Mara and Luke said in unison.

Mara laughed. "We have to go forward. Life around each other would be too awkward after we both admitted to loving each other. We would end up losing our friendship anyway."

"Okay," the therapist said slowly. "Mara I would like you to list the pros and cons of having a relationship with Luke."

Mara groaned. This was way too personal, but if she wanted to have a relationship with the Jedi she had to learn to be honest with him.

"He is extremely handsome with a very nice body," Mara said softly. "He probably is worldlier than most people in the galaxy, but he still manages to maintain his farmboy innocence and sense of wonder." Mara thought silently. "He is honest and kind. He runs into danger to help me with no thought to his safety. He has been a better friend to me than any other person."

"Anything else?" Dr. Nidor asked as she picked up her datapad and taped in more notes.

Mara blushed slightly. "I assume sex with him would be great."

Luke shifted in his seat embarrassed.

"If we did marry," Mara continued, "we probably would have beautiful Force strong children."

That comment made Luke do a double take.

"Good," the therapist commented. "What are some of the cons to being in a relationship with Luke?"

Mara considered the question carefully. "There is the danger that the relationship won't work."

The therapist looked up from her datapad, "Go on, what else?"

Mara shrugged. "That's pretty much it."

The doctor put down the datapad. "Mara, everybody faces the danger of rejection or a relationship not working out. The only way you can totally avoid the pain is if you never allow yourself to love someone, and I suspect that has been what you were doing prior to your accident. Do you want to grow old alone? Do you want to see Luke remain your friend but go on to date another woman?"

Mara felt her heart restrict. "No, I don't want that. I have been through that already."

"What do you mean?" the doctor asked for clarification.

"I was friends with Luke and it killed me to see him with other women, especially Callista."

The doctor looked over to Luke.

"Callista was an old girlfriend," he explained.

"A really, really old girlfriend," Mara jibbed.

"Don't start that again." Luke shot back.

Mara gave him a contrite look. "Sorry, those old sarcastic habits are coming back." Mara grabbed Luke's hand in hers and gave it a warm squeeze.

Luke's smiled, but then his expression turned serious as he turned to look into her emerald eyes. "If you ever expressed any interest in me I would never have dated any of those women."

Mara's head dropped. "I know, but I couldn't allow myself to become vulnerable by love back then, and maybe not now. There is too much in my past to overcome."

"Mara, Luke," the counselor interrupted. "I think the best way to overcome anxiety about the future is to deal with the past. I must admit I'm not quite prepared for what you two are grappling with, especially since I thought I was going to a pre-marital counseling session today. I would like to talk to Dr. Defel and do some research before we continue with the therapy."

Both Mara and Luke nodded their approval. This session was not painful, but it was awkward to be discussing such personal matters in front of another person, let alone among themselves.

"Listen, since I thought I had a couple who planned to marry and wanted to iron out a few issues first, I printed off a Flimsiplast detailing 25 ways to improve your relationship. Maybe you two can tackle some smaller issues on your own using this worksheet. We can schedule another meeting later in the week and then maybe I will be better equipped to work with some of the deeper issues bothering you two." The doctor said as she handed the flimsi to Mara. "At the front desk you can schedule an appointment and sign the reciprocal agreement forms."

The doctor stood signifying the end of the session. "It was a pleasure meeting you Master Skywalker," the therapist smiled as she shook Luke's hand. She then turned to Mara. "It was also a great pleasure to meet you Mara."

.

.

The couple said their goodbyes and left Dr. Nidor's office. They scheduled their follow up appointment and then made their way out to busy Coruscant walkways which criss-crossed the city planet.

Luke held Mara's hand and gave it a gentle squeeze whenever he felt her mood falter.

"Come on," Luke said. "Let's get some lunch, I'm starved."

Mara smiled, "You're always hungry." She thought about it for a moment. "Sure, I can eat."

Mara offered him her arm and he led her down the pedestrian platform towards a restaurant they were fond of.

When they arrived they opted for a table on an outside patio of the eating establishment. A blue female twi'leki waitress came and took their order leaving Luke and Mara to wait for their meal.

"That was an interesting session." Luke finally said.

Mara nodded, "Do you think it will help?"

Luke shrugged. "I don't know, I have never done this before. How do you feel?"

Mara thought about it. "About the same…confused and anxious. But I think it may help us in the long run."

"Good," Luke said quietly. "I think we should follow the doctor's orders and leave the big issues for the counseling sessions."

"Same here," Mara agreed. She looked up suddenly and then back down to the table, a smirk touching her lips. "Don't look now, but we have company."

Luke turned around and spotted Lando moving towards them down the pedestrian path. He was walking with an Ithorian, flashing his signature suave smile, and talking in an overly enthusiastic manner. There was little doubt he was trying to convince the alien of something…most likely to invest in some risky investment venture. Lando looked up, saw Mara and Luke and stopped. He said something to the Ithorian, shook his hand and then started walking towards the restaurant.

"Well, hello," he said smoothly as he pulled a seat from an empty table and then boldly sat down next to Mara. "Mara, I haven't seen you since the party. I was wondering if you want to go out dancing again, perhaps some dinner, maybe this time we can actually get to dessert." He said shooting Luke and accusatory look.

"Can it, Calrissian," Mara said as she rolled her eyes.

Lando's smiled faltered, "Ah, what?" Apparently confused at the very different reception he was getting from Mara.

Luke laughed. "She's got her memory back." Luke informed the smooth talking gambler.

Lando's smile dropped completely. "You remember everything, Mara?" He asked nervously.

"Don't worry Calrissian, I am not going to kill you for taking me out on a date. After all, I asked you and second, I had fun."

Lando smiled, "Well, in that case maybe we can do it again sometime."

"No," Luke said quickly. "The best man won and it wasn't you." Luke winced when he realized how smug that sounded.

Lando looked confused for a moment, but then his eyebrows lifted slightly as he mouthed a silent, "Oh".

"So," Lando said changing the subject. "You remember everything now?"

Mara laughed again. "Oh yeah, in fact I think I remember some events even clearer now." Her voice took on a conspiratorial tone.

"Like what?" Lando asked, not sure if he wanted to know the answer.

Mara twisted in her chair so she could face him fully. "I remember you when I was posing as Arica at Jabba's Palace. I also remember you were the guard who made a crude proposition to me and I ended up kneeing in the groin."

Lando grimaced. "That was you, wasn't it?"

"Yes that was me, but I can see how you would lose track of things since you were busy working your way through the dancers and pleasure slaves on your off hours."

"Hey, wait," Lando said defensively, "I had to play the part."

Mara laughed. "Well you played your part well. Let's see you kriffed Lyn-Me, Oola, Rystall Sant," She paused and gave a sly look to Luke, "He even slept with Yarna d'al' Gargan!"

Luke gave Mara a confused look. "The Askajian female!" She explained. Luke shrugged his shoulders still puzzled. "She was the heavy-set six breasted dancer."

"Oh!" Luke said a little too loudly. He noticed a few other patrons looked his way. He lowered his voice and while trying not to laugh he whispered to Lando "You really were playing the part. Did you get the Kowakian Monkey-Lizard's comlink number?" Luke asked referring to Jabba's pet.

Mara and Luke both burst out laughing.

"Ha, ha, very funny. That's the thanks I get for risking my life for Han." He started to stand, but Mara grabbed his hand and pulled him back down to his seat. "We're just joking Lando," Mara said amiably. "Listen, I want to thank you for everything you have done for me in the past few weeks."

"Um…your welcome, Mara." Lando said surprised at her sincere soft tone.

Both men couldn't help but notice that this interaction was not quite like pre-accident or post-accident Mara… but something in between. Before they could think about it much the food arrived. Mara cordially invited Lando to join them, but he begged off saying he was late for a meeting. Before he left he have Luke's shoulder a squeeze. "Congratulations, Luke." the gambler whispered with a winked before he departed.

"What was that all about?" Mara asked.

"He was congratulating me for winning your heart." Luke said honestly.

"Oh," Mara said simply. Not arguing that fact.

Mara and Luke silently ate, occasionally sneaking looks at each other.

"Maybe it will be alright, Luke." She finally said.

A smile spread across his face. "I think so too Mara, I think so too."


	16. Chapter 16

The next day after lunch, Mara and Luke decided to look over the flimsiplast the counselor had given them the day before. They were both seated on Luke's sectional couch. Mara was sitting crossed legged with her back against the padded armrest while Luke sat sideways facing her.

"Okay, what does the flimsi suggest we do," he asked hoping this homework assignment the counselor gave them would not be too emotionally taxing.

Mara read over the form for a minute. "Well, it says here that if you do at least one of these suggestions each day it would have a positive effect on our relationship, but we have to be dedicated to fulfilling the program in order to get the best results."

"Okay, give me the first one." Luke said.

"Number one, _eat as many meals together as often as possible."_ Mara rolled her eyes. "I think we have that one covered." She reached over to the side table and picked up a stylus and checked off that suggestion.

"I want something interesting to do." She frowned as she went down the list. "There must be some really dysfunctional couples out there because some of these suggestions are obvious. _Dress nice for your partner, take a walk, smile often,"_ She looked up and gave Luke a brilliant false smile. "This relation stuff is a snap." She went to the next idea listed. _"Watch a holo together."_

"I heard _Hold My Lightsaber_ was pretty good," Luke joked causing Mara to blush deeply.

"Please don't remind me of my immature behavior that night," Mara moaned, covering her eyes with her hand. "Oh Force, I can't believe I asked to hold your lightsaber."

"It's in my room if you still would like to handle it." Luke laughed.

"Knock it off Skywalker! I'm embarrassed enough."

"You were playful that night, there is nothing to be ashamed of," Luke remarked.

"Yeah, right. You weren't the one wearing a dress that is better described as belt with delusions of grandeur." Mara scoffed as she read down the list farther. "But it's okay to laugh if you want because that is the next bullet point: _laugh at your partner's mistakes."_

"What's the next one?" Luke asked quickly before Mara could bring up a list of his many mistakes.

"Go dancing together."

Luke made a snorting sound.

"You didn't like dancing?" Mara asked him incredulously. "The way you were groping me that night you seemed to enjoy it."

Luke made an exasperated sound, "that is not what I was doing Mara."

She rolled her eyes, "If it wasn't your hands on my butt, you better talk to old Obi-Wan and tell him to keep his Force-ghost hands off of my backside."

Luke was tired of arguing this point with everyone: his sister, Han, the Rogues. "Mara I was holding down your dress. Why did you have to wear a thong that night? You were flashing your backside to anybody who looked. What were you thinking?"

"Well, first of all I wasn't wearing a thong, and second, I believe I was thinking about seducing a certain blue-eyed Jedi, which at the time I thought was working, but now I find out he was just trying to protect my modesty."

Luke gave her a confused look. "What do you mean you weren't wearing a thong I distinctly saw flesh peeking out from under that dress!"

She gave him a sly smile. "That may be so, but I wasn't wearing a thong."

Luke gazed at her confused, but when he realized what she was saying his eyes then went wide as his jaw dropped. "Mara!"

"I WAS TRYING TO SEDUCE YOU!" She said enunciating every word loudly. "And you bring me home and send me to bed ALONE. And then you wonder why I thought you weren't attracted to women." Mara threw up her hands in disgust. "I would rather forget about that night and see what else is on this list."

"Aren't we supposed to just do one of these things per day," Luke pointed out. "We ate breakfast already that should count."

"I just want the first one we do to be something interesting." Mara explained as she ran down the list. _"Share each other's interests, talk to each other daily, surprise each other…"_

"I think I got my surprise for today." Luke jibed sardonically.

Mara glanced up at Luke with an amused expression on her face. She shook her head slightly as she stood up and went toward her room. "I'm going to give you a break Farmboy. If I don't tell you the truth I think your head will explode." She disappeared into her bedroom chamber and after a few moments came out with something in her hand. "This is what I was wearing that night," She laughed as she tossed a small bundle of cloth at Luke.

Luke caught it one-handed and then turned it over and eventually held it out with both hands examining the item. It was a pair of normal sized female underwear, but it was skin-toned and on the back of the briefs an image of a woman's backside was airbrushed onto the fabric. Luke had seen T-shirts with painted-in muscles before. They were popular with teenage boys, but he had never seen anything like this.

"They're called _Like Nothing's There_ ," Mara said with amusement. "It gives the illusion that you are not wearing anything underneath. Did you actually think I would go commando to a nightclub?"

She couldn't help notice that Luke was not laughing. "It is the 'in' thing to wear," she tried to explain. "Most of the women at the club were wearing them. Didn't you notice?" She asked the Jedi.

"I wasn't looking at other women's backsides," Luke said defensively.

An eyebrow shot up and a sly smile appeared on Mara's face. "So are you admitting that you do stare at my backside?" she asked coyly.

Luke blushed. "Mara, why are we teasing each other? You know I only have eyes for you."

She smiled brightly as she took the panties out of his hand and went to return them to her room.

"How did you find out about that type of undergarment," Luke called out to her. "I've never heard of them before."

Mara came back out of her room and grinned. "Your sister pointed them out while shopping."

Luke's eyes widened in surprise. "My sister knows about things like that?"

Mara dropped back down on the couch. "From what she told me, it appears Han likes roll-playing. Leia said he…"

"Stop!" Luke said as he jumped off the couch and put his hands over his ears. "I don't want to hear anything about my sister's sex life." He went over to the kitchen and poured himself a drink of water. "Is this what women talk about when together?" Luke asked incredulously.

Mara just laughed, "You wouldn't believe what women tell other women." She gave him a knowing look. Luke was going to ask what else Leia told her, but decided he was better off not knowing. He hoped Leia didn't mention _'the kiss'._

"Now that I calmed your mind about my nightclub escapades, can we continue?" Mara said with a feigned look of annoyance as she picked up the flimsi and then went back to reading.

"There has to be something fun on this list." Mara continued rattling off the recommendations, but then she suddenly stopped.

"Is that all of them?" Luke asked as he sat back down on the couch.

"No, there are a few others," Mara said evasively.

Luke snatched the flimsi out of her grasp. "No holding out Jade, we're doing the next one and get this over with for today." Luke worked his way down the list to where Mara left off.

"And the next challenge on the worksheet for today is..."Luke announced as his finger moved down the list and landed on the next suggestion. " _Give your partner a long kiss every day._ "

Now he knew why she stopped.

He looked up at Mara. "How do you feel about that?"

"I remember our first kiss," Mara reminisced softly. "It felt wonderful. It was like I broke free of gravity."

She turned and looked at Luke seriously. "Every instinct that I have is telling me 'no', that I should leave this apartment and get off planet…but then I remember how I felt that night when you told me you loved me and I want that feeling back desperately."

"I don't know," Luke said hesitantly. "Maybe we should just watch a holo for now."

"Luke, if we watch _'Hold my Lightsaber'_ I am going to want a lot more than a kiss," she said as she moved slightly closer to the Jedi.

"Well, I didn't mean watch that particular holo," he said as he slid toward the beautiful woman sitting next to him. "We could watch Vibroblade III."

"Ack, that movie would make Vader queasy." Mara protested as she shifted the remaining distance until their legs touched.

Before Luke could make another recommendation Mara leaned over and pressed her lips to his. It was a simple kiss at first, but soon Luke felt Mara's tongue press against his lips trying to gain entry to his mouth. He wrapped his arms tightly around her pulling her firmly against his body as their tongues dueled in a wild open mouth kiss. Luke finally pulled away and laid his head on her shoulder, trying to catch his breath.

"We should stop," he said reluctantly. "If we go further and things don't work out we won't be able to go back to being just friends." Luke explained.

"Luke," Mara said softly "I think I am way beyond the point of no return."

Luke chuckled. "I think I am also, but I want to give us the best opportunity for a successful relationship and I think rushing things isn't going to help. I can feel your underlying anxiety. We shouldn't start something we can't finish."

"If you hurry we can finish," Mara moaned.

Luke frowned, "That's not what I meant. Why start a romantic relationship before you beat this phobia? We don't want to end up with broken hearts."

"Damn you Skywalker," Mara protested as she detangled herself from Luke, "All that Jedi control is a pain sometimes." She said sounding irritated, but he could sense she was somewhat relieved.

"If you want we can work on Jedi control techniques, because the next thing listed is _meditate together._ " he suggested.

Mara playfully punched him on the arm. "Always trying to be the Master I see."

"Well, when we finally get to the last suggestion, maybe you can be the Master," he suggested.

Mara gave him a curious look and snatched the flimsi back from him to see what the last proposition was. "Oh," she said surprised, but then smiled. "If we ever make it to that point, I just may take you up on that offer."

.

.

"Thank you for returning," Dr. Nidor said cheerfully as she led the couple back into her office. Luke and Mara sat down in the same couch across from the doctor.

"So," the doctor said expectantly, "did you get to do any of the recommendations listed on the flimsi I gave you?"

"Sure," Luke said hesitantly, "We had our meals together."

"Good, good," The doctor looked to Mara. "Anything else?"

Mara smirked, "Farmboy forgot to tell you we kissed again."

The doctor's eyebrows went up, "Excellent, how did that go."

"Very good," Mara admitted with a smile. "But he made me stop there."

Dr. Nidor glanced over at the Jedi. "You didn't feel ready to move past that point, Luke?"

Luke shifted in his chair uncomfortably. "Doctor, we have known each other for a decade, but we never romantically dated. I don't want to rush things."

"I see, I see," the doctor repeated while tapping away on her datapad. "How did that make you feel, Mara?"

Mara rolled her eyes, "I don't know, sexually frustrated."

The doctor glanced at her surprised. "I thought it was you Mara that had the intimacy issues."

"I am," she said perturbed, "I'm okay in the heat of the moment, but when my brain reengages the anxiety comes rushing back. I know I am not psychologically ready to rush into a physical relationship, but during the moment…when I'm in his arms… I don't care. Unfortunately, I realize that afterwards I _would_ care—I don't want to mess up our future."

The doctor nodded her head in understanding. "That's very understandable. I think you both are very wise to move slowly." The doctor stood and moved to her desk retrieving two small metal orbs. To Luke they looked like miniature versions of the target remotes he used during lightsaber training.

"These are REM pulsators," the doctor explained as she put one orb into each of Mara's hands.

"What do they do?" Luke asked.

"Have you ever watched a person in deep sleep?" The doctor asked. "Their eyes will move rapidly under their eyelids. You've seen that before haven't you?"

"Yes," Mara said. "It happens when you are dreaming."

"That's correct, and scientific studies have shown that during this time when your eyes are moving rapidly things are going on in your brain. In layman's terms, this is the time where your brain processes the events of the day. If you don't get into this type of deep sleep—like when you are highly stressed—often your brain doesn't get a chance to recuperate and sort out the events properly. When that happens, the memories of those events often have a way of coming back to haunt you."

Mara looked confused, "so what do these orbs do?"

"Well, it was discovered that we can mimic the brain activity which occurs during this type of sleep by simply stimulating the different sides of the brain in a rhythmic pattern…left, right, left, right." The doctor explained earnestly. "We put these orbs in your hand and they vibrate alternating from your right hand to left and back again. When it vibrates in your right hand it stimulates the left side of your brain and vice versa."

"So we are tricking the brain to think it's asleep?" Luke asked.

The doctor smiled brightly, "Exactly. What we will do is turn these orbs to start vibrating alternately and while that is happening we will have Mara discuss some of the events in her life she believes is hindering her happiness," the doctor explained. "Hopefully this brain stimulation in conjunction with delving into her troubled past will help her brain sort out unwanted emotions or compulsive behavior."

Mara looked at the doctor skeptically. "Does it work?"

"We have had much success with people experiencing traumatic stress disorders and other physiological problems." The doctor boasted.

Mara shrugged, "Okay, I am willing to try anything."

"Good," the doctor said eager to begin. "I guess I should have mentioned this during the last session Mara, if you would be more comfortable proceeding as individual therapy, I can ask Luke to leave."

Mara thought about it but then shook her head, "No, if we want to go forward as a couple, we shouldn't have any secrets." She looked over to Luke and smiled. "I'm okay with Luke staying."

"Very good," the doctor said as she pushed a button on her datapad. Mara jumped as the orbs began their rhythmic pulsing back and forth. "Mara, I want to sit back and get comfortable."

Mara leaned back and closed her eyes.

"I want you to think about something in your past that still deeply disturbs you," the doctor said softly.

Mara nodded.

"What are you thinking about?" The doctor asked.

"Luke, I am thinking about Luke." Mara said slowly almost in a trance.

That didn't surprise the Jedi. He was sure Mara was going to bring up the _Last Command_. He was startled by what she said next.

"Byss," Mara muttered, her eyes still closed but her faced tightened with emotion.

"What about Byss, Mara?" The doctor asked.

"I abandoned Luke on Byss," Mara said in a low sad voice. "I left him to the darkside. I could have helped, but I was scared."

She took in a deep breath and then let it out slowly. "I was humiliated to discover his untrained pregnant sister had to go save him while I stayed as far away as possible."

Luke looked shocked. "Mara, nobody expected you to go to Byss." He put his arm around his friend trying to comfort her.

"No, you don't understand," Mara exclaimed. "I should have helped your sister. I knew the Emperor better than anyone. You were my friend. You saved my life, you showed me friendship, and you were there whenever I needed you, but in your time of greatest need, I wasn't there!"

Luke looked over at Mara who still sat with her eyes closed clutching the vibrating orbs. He never knew Mara tortured herself over his time on Byss.

"Mara," Luke tried to comfort his friend. "Please don't worry about the past."

Mara wiped the tears from her eyes with the back of her hand. "I should have gone, but I just couldn't bring myself to go to Byss. I heard about the Emperor reborn and I was terrified. I was sure that if I came in his presence again I would never break free and worst of all, I wasn't sure if I would want to once under his control."

She opened her eyes and stared intently at Luke. "I had power and respect while the Emperor's Hand, I was afraid I would be lured to that life again. I didn't want that existence, but I feared I wouldn't be able to resist my old master. So I didn't come to rescue you, Luke. It is one of two major failures in my life that have disturbed me for a very long time."

The therapist looked a bit lost, but she was able to ask the obvious question. "What was your other failure, Mara?"

Mara didn't answer right away. "The other thing that plagued me for years," she said reluctantly, "was my failure to kill Luke on Tatooine.


	17. Chapter 17

"What!" Luke stammered. He had his arm around his friend's shoulder, but now he pulled away in shock.

"It's nothing personal Luke," Mara said softly.

"How can that possibly not be personal?" Luke asked confused.

Mara shifted in her seat, took a deep breath and then let it out slowly.

"Luke, I don't feel that way now. But before I met you it was something that tortured me daily. You have to remember that for years after the Emperor's death I believed it was _you_ and Vader that killed him. As my life started crumbling around me I kept thinking, _'This wouldn't have happened if you killed Skywalker. Your Master wouldn't be dead if your killed Skywalker! If you killed Skywalker you wouldn't be serving drinks in a rimworld, backwater tavern!' "_ she said heatedly. Mara realized she was now squeezing the REM pulsators with a death grip. She loosened her grasp, took a couple long deep breaths and tried to relax.

She looked up at Luke. "Don't get me wrong, I'm very happy that I didn't get a chance to take the shot on Tatooine… **now** , but before I met you—before I found out the truth—I thought about it probably a thousand times a day. And if I did somehow distract myself enough to get you out of my thoughts the Emperor would send me a wakeup call by blaring the _Last command_ in my head. Can you imagine how difficult it is to accept that your life is totally kriffed up and you only have yourself to blame?"

"I think I can understand." Luke whispered.

"How could you possibly understand," she snapped back. "You're the golden boy of the Alliance, loved by all. You're a Jedi Master with hundreds of dutiful apprentices who worship you. Your side won, so it is easy for you. You don't know what it is like to be looked at as a war criminal, a Sith-wanna-be, and a lackey to the Emperor. You don't know what it's like to be hated!"

"Mara," Luke said evenly. "I was given a medal after destroying the Death Star. I was able to cope with things for a while, knowing that battle station destroyed an entire world, but that didn't make it easier for me to accept that I killed hundreds of thousands of men that day. Other than Grand Moff Tarkin, many consider me the greatest mass murderer in the galaxy."

Mara's anger quickly cooled and turned to shock. "Luke, you don't really think like that, do you? It was war. It's not murder!"

"Yes, it was war," he agreed solemnly, "but that doesn't make those men any less dead. Those crewmembers had relatives. There are millions of people in this galaxy who lost a loved one on that battle station. Don't think for one minute that everybody loves me. I get more than my share of hate-holo messages."

"Oh Force, Luke, I'm so sorry," Mara said empathetically, "I sometimes forget how much you've been through. I didn't mean what I said, I'm just stressed out."

Luke gave her an accepting nod, but said nothing as a dark silence that fell over the room.

"Mara," the doctor finally said breaking the awkward moment. "Do you have any problematic memories about your time as an assassin?"

The redhead shook her head. "Surprisingly, I have very little problem dealing with my time as an assassin." That admission appeared to surprise both Luke and the doctor.

Mara rolled her eyes. "Luke, it wasn't like the Emperor had me out killing younglings. I was sent to kill drug lords, crime bosses, and treasonous imperials."

"No rebels?" Luke asked curious.

"Yes, one rebel and I missed," She said with a tight smile.

They both sat silently, not knowing what else to say. The vibrating in Mara's hands was becoming annoying and she was mentally exhausted from the session.

"I'm sure these contraptions work," she said while holding the pulsators out to the doctor, "but I am not ready for this."

The doctor nodded and retrieved the orbs from Mara. "Do you want to end the session?"

"Yes, please." Mara said in a tired voice. "I'm not sure if this is helping much."

"I am finishing up you desensitization plan," the doctor commented. "I'll have it at your next session.

Mara shook her head, "I'm not sure if I'm coming back."

"Mara," Luke started to speak, but she quickly put up her hand indicating for him to stop.

"Luke, just give me a little time."

Luke looked disappointed but nodded in agreement. "Sure, take as long as you want."

Luke and Mara stood and said their goodbyes to the doctor and left the office quietly. Mara's face couldn't hide her frustration at her lack of progress.

Luke put his arm around her shoulder and pulled her into an embrace. "We'll be fine Mara." Luke assured her. Mara only squeezed him back tightly and hoped he was right.

.

.

 

"I am glad your memories have returned since halting you medication," Dr. Defel commented while examining Mara in the neurology ward during her scheduled follow-up appointment.

"Your brain scans came back normal and there has been no reoccurrence of seizures. I think you are well enough for me to lift all medical restrictions ahead of schedule," the doctor continued. "You probably should keep the medical droid with you for a few months, just in case, but you're cleared to live on your own, pilot, consume alcohol—not at the same time of course—and continue normal activities."

There was a smile on the doctor's face, but Mara didn't share his enthusiasm. Now she had no excuse to reside with Luke and the thought of leaving him filled her with anguish. Although she still lived with the constant anxiety about having a relationship, she still drew comfort from being near him. It was a very strange dichotomy.

She didn't want to go back to her apartment, but she knew she should. There was no need to live together anymore and she knew Luke couldn't stay away from the Academy forever.

_'It would be better to leave now,'_ she thought sullenly.

Leaving was actually the last thing she wanted to do, but the constant anxiety was too much to bear. She knew that if she couldn't open herself fully to Luke there was no reason to torture him with the possibility.

_'Palpatine meddled with my head and psyche so much I can't be salvaged,'_ she thought sadly. _"Luke deserves better."_

Mara came to a decision, she would back to work, he would return to the Academy and soon they would be back to their normal routine of seeing each other a handful of times a planetary cycle. She only hoped that their friendship hadn't been damaged too much by their premature and erroneous proclamations of love.

_"I hate this!"_ she thought miserably.

"Luke mentioned you are having anxiety attacks and hand tremors," the doctor remarked breaking her train of thought.

"The returning memories have been difficult for me," Mara admitted.

"I was also told you stopped going to see Dr. Nidor?"

Mara frowned, "I am sure she is a fine doctor, but talking about my problems has never been something I enjoyed."

"She has done excellent work in the past," the doctor said as he reached into the pocket of his smock and pulled out a datachip. "This is for you." He placed the chip in her palm.

Mara turned it over in her hand. "What's on it?" she asked.

"Dr. Nidor wanted you to have the systematic desensitization plan she designed for you."

Mara nodded as she clenched her hand over the datachip. "Please thank her for me, and thank you doctor for your help."

Dr. Defel smiled, "I am just glad you're okay. Take care, Miss Jade."

Mara gave the doctor a goodbye wave as she left the exam room and went into the reception area where Luke waited for her.

"Is everything alright," he asked.

Mara sighed, "Yes, I'm fine and cleared to move back to my apartment and go back to work."

Luke gave her a stricken look. "You're moving out?"

"Luke there is enough rumors flying around about us, despite your sister's official press release about the accident and my recovery."

"I can care less about what the press says," Luke insisted.

Mara gave the Jedi a tired look. "We both knew my living with you was temporary. You have to get back to the Academy and I have to get back to my job with Karrde." Mara felt her hand trembling again and quickly clasped it with her other hand so Luke wouldn't notice. "This has been an emotional draining two months. I think we both need some time alone to think."

"If that's what you really want," he said dejected. "I thought you wanted to work things out between us."

Mara shook her head, "Luke, it's not you, it's me."

"Oh Force, Mara," Luke said exasperated. "I can't believe you just used that old cliché on me."

Mara looked around the waiting room to make sure they were alone. "Luke, I still feel the anxiety, I can't get past this…I'm sorry." Mara picked up her coat she left in the waiting room. "Can you hold this for me?" Mara handed Luke the datachip so she could put on her jacket.

"What's this?" Luke asked.

"Some desensitization program Dr. Nidor came up with," Mara said with no real enthusiasm as she turned toward the door. "I'm ready to go."

"Wait," Luke said as he moved to block Mara from exiting. "Mara, I believe in us and I want to try anything and everything before we give up. Let's try Dr. Nidor's plan."

Mara looked down at the ground in thought. "I don't know."

"Please Mara," Luke said as he stepped closer to his friend. "Please do it for me." He reached out and took her hand. "Please do it for us."

A small smirk came to her face. "You know how your begging affects me."

"You once told me you loved to see me beg, I just want to give you want you want," Luke said smiling.

"You're impossible," She whispered. "Okay, we'll do the doctor's program."

"Will you stay with me during that time?" Luke asked hopefully.

Mara rolled her eyes and she let out an exasperated breath. "Yes, I'll stay."

A broad smile stretched across the Jedi's face. He leaned forward and gave Mara a light kiss on the cheek. "You won't regret it."

"We haven't seen the plan yet," Mara reminded Luke. "I don't know if I will regret it or not.


	18. Chapter 18

When Mara got back to Luke's apartment she grabbed a datapad and inserted the chip. As she read Dr. Nidor's desensitization plan the blood drained from her face. When she finished she lowered the datapad and just stared at Luke in shock. "I regret promising to do this."

Luke looked confused. "What is it Mara? Dr. Nidor said this was the less stressful process."

Mara gave a sardonic laugh. "Luke, I think we both forgot what I needed to get desensitized to."

Luke gave a confused look, "you needed to get desensitized from your anxiety."

"Anxiety caused by being close to another person!" Mara shouted back.

Luke frowned, "let me see the datapad.

Mara handed it to him and he began to read, as he went through page by page he turned bright red. "This must be a joke," he finally said.

Mara folded her arms across her chest and glowered at the Jedi. "I don't think Dr. Nidor wrote this up as a joke."

"The first part is okay," Luke explained, "but the later parts are…" He broke off embarrassed.

"You don't want to go through with this?" She asked.

Luke tore his eyes from the datapad screen, "No, no, I will do anything."

Mara couldn't help but give him a wicked smile. "Anything?"

"Don't start Mara," Luke warned the former assassin. "And yes, I will do anything."

She laughed. "Okay then, let's start tomorrow."

.

.

**_Systematic Desensitization Therapy Day 1:_ **

"This is ridiculous," Mara complained as she sat cross-legged on the floor facing Luke. He was sitting in a similar fashion and close enough that their knees touched.

"Stop whining and put your hands on my knees," Luke remarked.

Mara gave the Jedi a hard look, but then reached over and placed her hands palm down on his knees. Luke reached across to Mara and did the same.

"How long do we have to sit like this?" Mara asked.

"Until you no longer get anxious by my touch." Luke explained.

"I don't get anxious when we touch," Mara declared obstinately.

Luke just smiled, "Remember our Force bond, Mara. I know you still feel apprehensive when I touch you. Oh you may like it when it's happening, but later on it causes you anxiety."

He felt the ire rise in Mara, she hated when Luke told her what she was feeling.

"Sorry for getting in your head," Luke said apologetically.

"This Force bond is a pain. And how come I can connect with you and not others?"

Luke thought about it, "I don't really know, you can talk to me and a couple times you achieved communication through the Force with my sister. And of course, you could talk to the Emperor."

Mara hands fidgeted while resting on Luke's knees. She knew she shouldn't let something so small as a simple touch upset her, but she felt her anxiety increase during contact.

"Do you think there is a genetic factor involved or could I have this connection to you and your sister because of my previous contact with your father?" She asked trying anything to distract herself from her growing unease.

Luke knitted his brow, "what do you mean genetic factor?"

"What I mean is was Darth Vader the son of Palpatine?"

Luke's eyes went wide. "Why would you even think of that?" He asked aghast.

"Do you know who Vader's father was?" she asked.

Luke shook his head. "No, but I see absolutely no family resemblance."

"I do," Mara said.

"What?"

"It's not much, but you have a cleft chin and the emperor had a cleft chin." She hesitated for a moment. "You once told me you saw your father without his mask? Did he have a cleft chin?"

The blood drained out of Luke's face as he remembered the image of his father with Ben and Yoda at the Ewok celebration. He did have a cleft chin. Luke shook his head, "That means nothing! If it was genetic then why could _you_ talk to Palpatine."

Mara looked stunned. She obviously never considered the implications. "Maybe some things are best left alone," she concluded.

She looked down at her hands on his knees, then to the chrono. "How much longer?" she asked impatiently.

"Until you feel comfortable with my touch," Luke said slightly annoyed. "And from what I feel in the Force we might be here a long time."

"It's a good thing I didn't drink anything before we started," Mara joked. "Or we might find ourselves in an interesting situation."

Luke chuckled. "I think we can let go to use the 'fresher.

They sat facing each other, hands pressed on their partner's knees for what seemed like an eternity.

"My legs are starting to fall asleep," Mara complained.

"Then I suggest you relax and get used to my touch," Luke countered.

Mara gave him a hard look, "Yes sir." Her voice took on a sarcastic tone.

"Come on Mara," Luke said softly, "think of it as meditation. You and I meditated all the time after your accident"

"That's because I didn't remember how much I disliked it," Mara shot back, but she did close her eyes and tried to relax.

After about a half hour Luke opened his eyes. "I think we can take a break," he said with a crestfallen look on his face.

"What's wrong?" Mara asked.

"Mara, you relaxed a little, but there was still a tremendous amount of underlying anxiety I sensed in you. As we continued I could feel your irritation increase with your boredom. Dr. Nidor said this is a gradual process. We can work on it tomorrow."

"Okay," Mara said slowly. "It's not working is it?"

Luke shrugged his shoulders. "Mara it is supposed to take weeks, we have been at for just over an hour. You have to be patient."

Mara scoffed, "Look who's trying to teach me about patience." She stood up and brushed off her pants.

"Believe me, I've learned a lot of patience in the last few weeks," Luke said in jest. "Don't worry, this will work."

Mara gave him a thin smile. "I hope so."

.

.

**_Systematic Desensitization Therapy Day 2:_ **

"At least this is a little more comfortable," Mara commented as she sat across from Luke at the kitchen table. Both of them had their arms stretched across the table top with their hands clasped together.

"I thought you might like this better," Luke commented. "How do you feel."

Mara smirked, "You know how I feel."

Luke just nodded. Mara was anxious at his touch. They had been at it for over an hour now and the therapy didn't seem to be doing much good. But it was only day two in a process that might take weeks. Luke could only hope that Mara was willing to continue treatment despite the obvious lack of progress. He could already feel her patience waning.

"This is boring," she complained. "Talk to me."

Luke gave her a cautious look. In the last few weeks Luke discovered that conversations with Mara often took a strange turn. "What do you want to talk about?"

She thought for a moment. "Well, we want to know more about each other, why don't we ask each other questions and we have to answer truthfully."

Luke groaned, "That sounds like a dangerous game coming from you."

Her eyes narrowed, "You're not scared are you?"

Luke shook his head. "No, but I know this is just a way to make me uncomfortable. After all, you already told me you like to see me flustered."

Mara laughed, "Don't worry Farmboy, I'll go easy on you. In fact I'll let you go first."

Luke sighed. What was he going to do? They were stuck holding hands across the table like a couple of lovelorn teenagers with nowhere to go. There was no getting out of this. "Okay," he agreed reluctantly.

He thought a moment. "Did you and Kyle Kartan have a romantic relationship?"

"No," Mara said quickly. "My turn. What women have you had relationships with?"

"I thought these were yes or no questions?" Luke complained.

"I don't remember that ever being brought up in the rules, so answer the question."

"I don't want to do this," Luke whined.

Mara squeezed his hands, "I answered your question, now answer mine."

Luke let out a deep breath, "Okay…there was Dani who I met during the rebellion, she liked me, but I was too shy back then to go forward with a relationship, so I guess she doesn't count. Then there was Shira Brie. She didn't go by that name of course and she only initiated a romantic relationship with me so she could spy on the rebels."

Mara gave the Jedi a flabbergasted look, but before she could speak Luke continued.

"I liked this girl named Tanith Shire and I thought I had a physical relationship her, but it turned out that a mind-witch named S'ybll had taken her form. When I realized she was a Force vampire, I quickly ended the relationship." Luke thought for a moment.

"There was Alexandra Winger who was a force sensitive pilot. That didn't lead to anything but a kiss. Gaeriel Captison dumped me then died. There was Mary from the planet Solay, she died. Jem Ysanna died saving me. Callista Ming left me. There was Akanah Norand who was a Fallanassi but she was a liar who was using me for my Force powers, so I left her. And then there's you."

Mara just stared at him slack-jawed. "Skywalker! You and Shira Brie? _Thee_ Shira Brie-the other Emperor's Hand, the woman who became _Lumiya 'The Dark Lady of the Sith'?"_

Luke shrugged. "I didn't know who she really was and please there is no need to comment on the others. You couldn't possibly say anything that Han hasn't already teased me about."

Mara scoffed, "Like what?"

Luke took in a deep breath and then blew it out. "He said, _'Hey Luke, I heard you had sex with the Emperor's Hand, was it the left or right one?_ , or there was _'Tell me Luke, what part of your body did the mind-witch suck the Force out of?'_ , then there were comments about Callista and cybersex and I can't remember what he said about Akanah, but I am pretty sure he had some smart-mouth comment."

Mara gave him an evil grin,"Did did Han ask you if Shira Brie spanked you with her lightwhip?"

"Mara!" Luke exclaimed annoyed, but then then he blushed. "Yeah, he did." He admitted.

Mara chuckled, "What does he say about me? Let me guess, another Emperor's Hand joke?"

Luke shook his head. "No, he likes you."

"Oh," Mara looked surprised.

"Why are you surprised? You saved the twins, you saved me. Leia may have not trusted you completely at first, but you have to understand what she suffered under the Empire. She lost everybody she knew and loved on Alderaan. It was really difficult for her to trust anybody with Imperial ties for a very long time."

Mara nodded silently. He looked at their hands clutching each other. "I still feel anxious, do you sense any decrease through the Force?"

Luke shook his head.

Mara abruptly let go of his hands in frustration. "This isn't working."

"Mara, this is only day number two. Give it time." He reached over and grabbed her hands back in his own. "Anyway, it's my turn to ask a question."

Mara rolled her eyes. "I shouldn't have suggested this game."

Luke smiled, "but you did, so answer my next question. Who have you had romantic relationships with?"

"You," she responded.

"Yes, I know me, but who came before me?"

Mara looked down at their hands. "Luke, if I can't handle the anxiety of holding hands with my closest friend, why would you think I could handle a relationship with anybody else?"

Luke cocked his head sideways. "You mean…"

"Yes, I have never been with anybody else."

Luke was shocked. He realized she probably wouldn't be able to maintain a long term relationship, but he thought she might have been with somebody at some time.

"I know what you are thinking," she said irritably. "If Shira Brie would use sex as a tool of the trade, why not the other Emperor's Hands?"

Luke shook his head profusely, "No, Force no, I never thought that!"

Mara's head dropped. "Not that it wasn't hinted that I should use _'all resources at my disposal'_ , but I could never bring myself to stoop to that level. I think the Emperor over did it when it came to conditioning me to avoid attachments. The thought of having sex with somebody puts me into a panic." She looked up and saw Luke's shocked look. "Don't get me wrong Luke, I want to have a normal sexual relationship…. I really, really want it, but letting myself take that step has so far been impossible for me."

"I shouldn't have asked…I didn't know," Luke looked away flustered, knowing he shouldn't have brought up such a difficult subject.

"Well, it's not something one advertises." Mara replied self-consciously.

Both sat silently for a long time.

"I would love to be your first," Luke was surprised when the words came out of his mouth.

Mara chuckled at his boldness. "These desensitization sessions are making you less shy." She gave him a warm smile. "I want you to be my first, last and only. I just need to break through my conditioning."

"We'll make it," Luke said while squeezing her hands.

As the anxiety built up in Mara she could hope the therapy started working soon.

.

.

**_Systematic Desensitization Therapy Day 7:_ **

"I can't take much more of this, Luke," Mara complained. The two were standing together in the center of his living room in a close embrace. They hugged each other tightly, their bodies pressed together and their faces cheek to cheek. A couple months ago Mara would have been thrilled to be in Luke's arms, but after standing like this for about an hour she was on the edge of a complete and total anxiety attack.

"Just relax," Luke whispered in her ear. "You're so tense."

Mara wiggled in his embrace trying to get comfortable. "Blast Luke, you are making it impossible for me to relax!"

He pulled his head back slightly so he could look in her anxious green eyes. "What am I doing now," he asked.

She raised an eyebrow and smirked at him. "What are you doing? How do I put this delicately?" She pretended to contemplate the question. "My discomfort could be coming from one of two things. One, either you have your lightsaber in your pocket and its jabbing me in my stomach or two, you are enjoying this session way too much!"

Luke broke away from contact for a moment to look down at his pants and then turned bright red. "I'm sorry Mara," Luke apologized but he quickly pulled her back into his embrace.

"Is that it?" Mara said incredulously, "You're sorry, now back to the exercise?"

"Yep," was all Luke said.

"We have been at this for a week and I don't feel any closer to getting desensitized to my anxiety," Mara said hotly as she pushed Luke away.

"This is not working! She yelled turning away from him.

Luke tried to embrace her again, but she dodged him. "Stop it, this is a ridiculous. Systematic desensitization may be great for some people, but it is not working with me."

Luke's stomach started to knot in panic. Through the Force he could feel frustration and despair projecting off of Mara in waves. "The Emperor took years molding me into the emotionally dysfunctional person you see today; all the hand holding in the world can't fix what's broke inside of me."

"Mara, please," Luke beseeched his friend to calm down.

"Luke, this therapy is not working or else we would have seen some improvement."

Mara's fists were clenched to her side. One hand was trembling noticeably. She closed her eyes tightly as tears ran down her cheeks in frustration. The turmoil Luke felt within her was palpable. He could sense her despair, anxiety and, to Luke's dread, total defeat. The Force was churning with anguish and hopelessness. When Mara opened her eyes she gave him an empty, bleak look—a look that scared him.

He was about to hug his friend and comfort her, when he felt a shift in the Force so strong that Luke was actually startled back a step.

It felt like something snapped within his friend. Mara's desperation suddenly morphed into pure determination. She had made a decision, about what Luke did not know.

"What's going on Mara?" Luke asked confused as she turned away from him wordlessly and quickly walked to the kitchen.

"Mara…Mara what are you doing?" Luke asked nervously.

Mara completely ignored the Jedi as she grabbed an old grocery bag, opened one of the cabinets and started loading it with some of the ration bars she had bought for snacks. She then grabbed some bottled water and a few other items. She quickly walked past the confused Jedi without a word and went to her room.

"Mara, are you packing?" Luke asked miserably. "Please Mara don't give up. Don't quit. I've never known you to be a quitter."

That comment got a rise out of the redhead. "Don't you call me a quitter Skywalker!" She hissed angrily. She walked up to face him. "I'm not a quitter, but I am not stupid. I know when something isn't working. And Systematic Desensitization is NOT working." She spat out the last words furiously.

She went back to the kitchen to pack up some more food items and went back to her room.

"Mara, please, I'm begging you," Luke pleaded. He felt like his heart was breaking and his last shot at happiness was about to walk out the door. "Don't give up on us!"

"Is that what you think?" She was almost in a rage now. "I'm not giving up on us Luke, I'm giving up on Dr. Nidor's desensitization plan!"

A crease came to Luke's brow as he tried to figure out what she was planning.

Mara went over to the end table next to the couch and grabbed up the flimsi Dr. Nidor gave to them during their first session.

She walked over to Luke and grabbed him by his shirt and dragged him over to her sleeping chamber door.

"I'm not quitting, I'm changing plans!" She projected through the Force a fierce resolve that shocked Luke. "No more desensitization, we are going to EXTREME EXPOSURE THERAPY!" she bit out, "And we are going to combine that with suggestion number twenty-five of this list." She shoved the flimsy in Luke's hand.

"What?" Luke asked totally confused.

Mara gave him an almost predatory smile, "What I mean is we are both going into my room and we are not going to leave until you have knocked all the anxiety out of me. I don't care if it takes days! We have food and water and an adjoining 'fresher, so let's get at it." She unceremoniously pushed the bewildered Jedi into her room. "And get your clothes off, I need full body contact to make this work!" She said firmly as she closed and locked the door behind her.

She turned pressing her back to the door as she raked her eyes up and down Luke, "This therapy is my last chance, Luke. Don't let me down, promise me."

Luke was astonished he was able to form words. "I…I promise," Luke looked at the flimsy skimming down to the last suggestion. "Mara the twenty-fifth suggestion is to _make love with your partner often._ We're not ready for…."

That was the last thing Luke was able to say before Mara was upon him.


	19. Chapter 19

**_Extreme Exposure Therapy: 1st hour_ **

Luke was absolutely exhausted.

He and Mara were lying in bed, both clutching to each other tightly as their bodies cooled in the aftermath of their long and intense love making. Luke knew he should feel sated and calm, but he couldn't help but feel anxious, even scared by the sudden step they took in their relationship.

_'Force, we've done it now!'_

Not that he was complaining, making love to Mara was the most amazing thing he had ever experienced. They were able to bond together not just in body, but also in mind. Luke had never experienced such intertwining of thoughts as he did with Mara. He could see deep into her soul and she held nothing back from him. He delved deeply into her—both physically and emotionally. The combination of the connection of mind and body brought Luke to heights of pleasure that he had never thought possible. Compared to Mara, all other women paled in comparison, especially Callista. Luke couldn't believe how much the Force could play a part in this type of intimate connection.

Luke now knew he could never give her up, she was like a drug and he was now an addict. His anxiety came from the thought that if this therapy didn't work, she would leave him…and if she did that he would not be able to go on.

He felt a soft kiss on his neck. He turned to look into green eyes. "That was amazing," she said softly.

"I have never felt this way before," Luke admitted. "But what if this doesn't work."

Mara ran a finger down his chest until her hand disappeared under the sheets covering them. "I guess we should continue with the therapy…just to make sure it works," she said as she gave the Jedi a long passionate kiss.

When their lips parted Luke grinned, "I did promise you that could be the master."

.

.

**_Extreme Exposure Therapy: 3rd hour_ **

Luke tried to catch his breath. "Force Mara, for somebody who's never done this before today, you sure know a lot."

Mara grinned and kissed Luke lightly on the neck and started working down his chest. She looked up at him and smiled. "I do have a confession to make."

Luke frowned, "What?"

"I watched more holofilms than just "Hold My Lightsaber".

"Well, that explains a whole lot," Luke smirked. "Which ones?"

"Hmm…well, there was _Undercover Agent_ , _The Auction, Encounter on Myrkr, One Night, Silent Fantasies, The Taming of the Jedi,_ and _Whisper My Weakness._ "

"Mara!" Luke exclaimed stunned. He then chuckled, "I think I would rather forgo some of the angst my character underwent in the last two holoflicks."

"I knew it!" Mara laughed, "you do watch those holos!"

He gave a look of chagrin. "Mara, they are about me, it was just curiosity on my part."

"Oh sure farmboy, curiosity." Mara scoffed.

He tried to give her an innocent look, but started laughing. "Which holo do you want to act out now?"

Mara thought about it, "How about _One Night_?"

"Which holo, there was a whole series?" Luke asked.

Mara grinned, "All of them."

.

.

**_Extreme Exposure Therapy: 5th hour_ **

_'Five hours,'_ Luke couldn't believe Mara's stamina.

They had been making love for hours with only occasional breaks for water and to use the 'fresher. At first Luke could feel the anxiety building up within the lovely woman in his arms, but he discovered that she could forget her worries—albeit temporarily—if she was totally distracted. So Luke strived to be the biggest distraction in Mara's life. He was surprised as to how open Mara was with him not only physically, but within the Force. Luke and Mara's Force essence twirled and wrapped around each other as if emulating the choreography of their bodies.

While Luke was immersed within Mara's essence he noticed something that he could only describe as a dark spot within her Force signature. Luke tried to concentrate on that area within Mara's mind, but she was doing her best to detour his attention back to other activities. It took an infinite amount of Jedi willpower, but he finally summoned up the Force around him and wrapped his light around the darkness. The mysterious aberration grew smaller and smaller until it finally vanished. The second it disappeared Mara cried out Luke's name. He wasn't sure if it was the departure of the darkness or their lovemaking that pushed Mara over the edge, but he soon found himself falling over the same apex before he dropped down to the bed exhausted.

They rolled onto their backs, trying to catch their breath.

After a few moments Mara rolled over and looked into Luke's soft blue eyes. "Let's do that again," Mara said seductively.

"Mara, you can't possibly have an anxious nerve left in your body," Luke said exhausted.

"I don't know, I still feel a little apprehensive," she remarked with a sly smile.

"Liar," Luke said with a broad grin on his face. "At least let me take a break," Luke begged. "I'm not eighteen anymore."

"Okay, but hold me while you sleep," Mara asked.

Luke rolled over to his side and spooned with Mara. "Do you think it is going to work?" He asked sleepily.

"I think so," Mara said. "Something feels different now."

"Good," Luke murmured. He wanted to ask her about their Force meld and what he encountered, but before he could say a word he drifted off to sleep.

He was awakened moments later by this comlink buzzing. "Frack, why now?"

"Let it go to voice mail," Mara said half asleep.

"I have different tones for different people," Luke said. "That's my sister's buzztone. If I don't answer we take the chance of her coming over." Luke disengaged from Mara and then leaned over the bed feeling around the floor for his pants. He finally located his trousers and retrieved the comlink out of his pocket. "Luke here," he said as he activated the device.

"Luke, where are you? Did you forget you were supposed to meet me to go over the financial stats for the Academy budget committee?" Luke grimaced as he looked at his chrono. He was supposed to meet Leia an hour ago.

"Sorry Leia," he said in his most apologetic tone, "Something came up."

That prompted a laugh from Mara. Luke turned to her covering the comlink microphone with his hand. "Shhhh!" He gave her a stern look but that just got Mara giggling again.

"Luke," Leia said slowly, "Are you alright, you sound tired?"

When Mara started snickering again he threw his pillow on top of her to try to muffle the laughter.

"Is that Mara I hear," Leia asked.

Luke thought frantically. "Umm, yeah we were working on some of Dr. Nidor's therapy exercises."

"Oh," Leia finally said. "Is she working with those pulsating balls again."

That was it, Mara started laughing hysterically and fell out of bed.

"What's going on?" Leia asked concerned.

"They're called REM Pulsator orbs!" Luke corrected Leia. "And no we aren't using those."

"We should," Mara whispered naughtily, "I can think of an interesting way of using them." That was following by another fit of laughter.

Luke tried to ignore her. "Umm Leia, I'm sorry for being a no-show. I am in the middle of something here, can I call you back later?"

He didn't wait for Leia's response. He shut off his comlink and tossed it off the bed. He then crawled across the sheets and looked over the mattress to glare at the nude woman laughing hysterically on the floor, tears running down her cheeks, her golden-red hair spread out around her head and shoulders.

"That was too funny," she said when her laughter subsided enough to talk.

Luke tried to keep a straight face, but failed. "What was funny was seeing you fall off the bed, giggling and nude." He smiled. "I haven't heard you laugh like this since you got your memories back. It's nice to hear."

"I haven't felt this good…ever," Mara said quietly. "When our Force signatures melded together, I almost felt like there was a healing going on, did you feel it?"

Luke nodded. "I am not sure what exactly happened. It was almost like there was a residue of the darkside within you, I think it was something the Emperor planted within your mind."

"Is it gone?" she asked anxiously.

Luke smiled, "Yes, it's gone. Do you feel different?"

Mara nodded. "Very different," she said as she stood up and scooted back in bed with Luke.

"I've never had a Force connection with anybody else like we have Mara," Luke said in awe.

"Me neither," Mara admitted. "The Emperor and I could communicate with each other, but I only heard what he wanted me to hear, but he could search my mind at will." Mara shuttered, "I didn't realize it at the time, but he was violating me mentally." She pauses and gazed at Luke, "but with you, I don't feel that way. You're not taking…I'm giving."

Luke hugged her fiercely. "I love you." He had said those words once before, but this time it didn't feel like a simple declaration of affection, but the final process of binding their souls together.

"I love you too, Luke." Tears welled up in her eyes. Luke could feel her trembling in his arms.

"Are you all right?" he asked concerned.

"Yes," Mara said her voice breaking with emotion. "I'm just overwhelmed by what has happened…overwhelmed in a good way. I'm finally happy."

Luke broke out in a wide smile as he pulled her back down to bed and tossed a sheet over them. "I'm glad."

They lay silently for a while. "Luke," Mara said softly.

"Yes."

"What's going to happen to us now?" she asked.

"We get some sleep and build up our strength for the next therapy session," Luke replied.

"No, you know what I mean, what is going to happen to us, next week, next month?"

"Anything you want Mara?" He said truthfully, at this point he would do anything for this woman.

"I want to be with you, but how are we going to work around you teaching at the Academy and me working for Karrde?"

"I'll take a leave of absence and do supply runs with you." Luke volunteered.

Mara shook her head. "No, I couldn't do that to you. The Jedi need you."

"This Jedi needs you, Mara." Luke looked deeply into her eyes. "I am going to say something and I ask that you not react until you hear me out, promise?"

Mara nodded.

"You could come live with me at the Academy. You could train to be a Jedi," he could see that obstinate look forming on Mara's face. "Or don't train, but be there with me," he added quickly.

Mara chewed on her lower lip deep in thought. "Luke, I can't go live with you and be a student also. That would look wrong."

"Not if the student is my wife," he said quietly with a nervous but hopeful look on his face.

"What?" was all Mara could manage to say.

"Marry me," Luke whispered earnestly. "After what we have been through together, can you ever imagine being apart?"

"No, I can't," Mara said quietly.

Luke frowned, "No, you won't marry me?"

Mara shook her head, "No, as in 'No, I can't imagine us ever being apart', and yes I will."

"Is that an 'I will' to training or getting married," Luke teased.

"Both," Mara laughed softly.

"Good," Luke said as he squeezed her tightly. "I want to be your first, last and only…forever."

Mara kissed him again and then smiled, "Yes, forever."


	20. Chapter 20

**Epilogue: 1 Standard Week Later**

"What do you think of my outfit?" Mara asked Luke as she smoothed out her clothing. She was wearing a casual sundress she purchased when shopping with Leia. "Is it too informal?"

"Mara we are going to see my sister, not address the senate." Luke said as he stood in front of the bedroom mirror adjusting his own clothing.

"We are going to tell your sister that we're getting married," Mara reminded Luke. "I want to make a good impression."

Luke looked at his fiancé and smiled. "You look beautiful, Mara."

A concerned looked crossed her face. "Do you think she'll be upset?"

Luke looked confused. "Who? Leia? Why in the worlds would she be upset?"

Mara shook her head at the Jedi's naiveté. "Because I am a formal Imperial assassin and you're her brother."

Luke went over to Mara and held her hands. "Leia is going to be thrilled and Han will be ecstatic." He pulled her into an embrace and kissed her passionately.

Mara pulled away looking flustered. "Farmboy, if you kiss me like that again we may never leave the bedroom."

Luke smiled, "That would be okay with me, but I am sure Leia will eventually send out a rescue party."

"That would be embarrassing," Mara conceded.

"Especially if the rescue team had to use a Hydraulic Pry Droid to pull us apart." Luke laughed.

Luke's comment about a rescue team reminded him of the event that started their twisted journey to romance. He gave Mara a questioning look, "I always wanted to ask you, why did you insist on going to the lower levels with me that morning of the accident?"

"The night before I had a vision that you were in trouble," she confessed. "I couldn't stand the thought of losing you."

Luke was deeply touched that Mara cared about him even back then.

"Thanks for coming with me," he said warmly.

"No problem," Mara replied. "We are talking about the morning of the accident right?"

"Mara!"

She laughed. "We should go, you don't want to miss another meeting with your sister." She offered Luke her arm and allowed him to lead her to his speeder.

.

.

Mara sat nervously in the passenger's seat of Luke's airspeeder as he guided it towards Han and Leia's apartment. Despite Luke's assurances, she was deeply concerned as to how the Solo's would react to the news. She thought Han would be okay with it, but she worried about Leia.

The time Mara and Leia went shopping together Leia didn't express any concerns about Mara's friendship with Luke, in fact, she appeared to encourage it. But accepting Luke's friendship with a former Imperial was one thing, being married to one, well, that was an entirely different matter.

It was a short flight to the Solo's residence. When they arrived at their door Mara began to suspect that Luke was also nervous about their impending encounter with his family. He was slow in ringing the door buzzer and when he finally built up the courage to do so he fidgeted nervously adjusting his clothing and brushing stray lint off his sleeves while he waited to be let in.

Leia was the one to answer the door. She smiled brightly when she saw the couple and ushered them both into the apartment foyer.

"Mara, I am so glad you are better," Leia said and she gave Mara a quick hug and then her brother. Han wandered into the living room across the entrance way. He gave the couple one of his lopsided grins. "Hey Luke, Mara, good to see you two. Do you want a drink?"

"None for me Han," Luke said. He turned to Mara, "Do you want something?"

She shook her head, "No, I shouldn't."

"Come on and sit down," Leia invited them into her living room. "You said you had news for us?"

Luke and Mara sat down together on Leia's couch and looked at each other nervously as Leia sat in a chair across from them. "We do have something to tell you," Luke said as he reached out and grasped Mara's hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Han, Leia, Mara and I are getting married."

Mara and Luke were nearly startled out of their seats when Han let out an anguished, "No!"

Mara and Luke looked at each other and back to Han. _This_ they did not expect. They were even more startled with Leia jumped out of her chair and yelled, "Yes!" while pumping her fist in the air.

Leia turned to face her visibly upset husband. "You owe me flyboy, pay up!"

Han frowned but reached into his trouser's pocket and pulled out a handful of credit chips, which he handed to his wife. "And you promised to come to the opera with me," she reminded him.

Han groaned.

"Leia, Han, what's going on?" Luke asked totally confused.

Han went over to the bar to get a drink. "Leia bet me that you two would be engaged to be married before three months had past." Han filled a shot glass full of whiskey and chugged it down. "Now I have to go to the opera with your sister."

Luke was completely thrown off. "You mean you saw this coming?"

"Of course, Luke," Leia said, "We've been hoping that you two would get together years ago."

"I don't think I should have to pay up," Han proclaimed. "Getting Mara to buy and wear sexy clothing was cheating!"

Luke turned to his sister, "You did that on purpose!"

She blushed, "Obviously it worked."

"Well, maybe I'll win the next bet," he said mischievously as he poured himself another drink.

Leia scoffed, "They only just got engaged, there is no way they will have a baby by the end of a standard year."

"She's got you there, Han," Luke smirked. "What are you going to have to do when you lose that one?" Luke laughed, but his laughter was cut short when he noticed that Mara wasn't amused but actually looked shaken and wide-eyed.

"What's wrong Mara," Luke asked.

"Can I talk to you privately," she said as she pulled Luke back to the foyer.

"What?"

"Luke, you have to realize that a woman who's a virgin and had panic attacks at the thought of having sex, probably wouldn't be using conception repressor meds."

Luke went wide-eyed, "Mara, what are you saying?"

She looked embarrassed, "Luke, it may be nothing, but I am a couple days late."

Luke gave a shaky smile as he reached out to touch Mara's belly. He stretched out with the Force and was shocked when he felt a small Force signature reaching back to him.

"Mara, you're pregnant!" he shouted in surprise.

"Yes!" Han yelled, "Leia has to go to the smashball championship games with me!"

Mara and Luke ignored the outbursts. "Are you upset?" Mara asked nervously.

A huge smile spread across Luke's face. "Upset? All my dreams have just come true this week! I'm ecstatic!" He picked up Mara and twirled her around the room. As he gently lowered Mara down to the ground he realized she didn't look very happy.

"Mara, you want the baby don't you?"

"Of course Luke, I just don't want to embarrass you by going to the altar obviously pregnant. People will think I trapped you into marriage."

Luke laughed. "Mara, I can care less what people think, but if it concerns you we can elope."

"Yes, elope!" Han said enthusiastically.

"Han," Leia gave him a warning glare.

Han looked at Leia, "No eloping is a great idea. Luke I heard of some Rogues getting married in an always-open chapel over by docking bay 88. You guys should go there…tonight."

Mara's eyes narrowed as she stared at her future brother-in-law. "What was the bet and what will you win if we elope, Han."

Luke noticed Leia blush, "You don't have to answer that question, Han," the former princess warned her husband.

"All I can tell you is it involves some roll-playing!" He laughed as he walked to the back of the apartment.

"Han, come back here!" Leia insisted.

"I have to find that metal bikini," he shouted back.

Mara and Luke both covered their mouths with their hands and tried not to laugh.

Han came back with a box. "I think this is our costume box," he said as Leia quickly ripped the container out of his hands.

"Costume box?" Luke stammered. He shook his head and covered his ears, "I don't want to know anything about this."

Leia looked like she was about to kill a certain former smuggler. "Han, pour some champagne we have to celebrate," she ordered as she took the box and shoved it into the hall closet. "Oh, and something non-alcoholic for Mara."

Han disappeared to the kitchen and returned with a bottle of bubbly and a glass of juice for Mara.

He filled up the champagne glasses and handed one to Luke and Leia.

"Sorry Mara, but the only juice I had is some of Anakin's jordari fruit drink," he said apologetically.

Mara smiled as she took the extended glass. "That's perfect."

Leia held up her glass for a toast. "Here's to Mara becoming part of the family." Leia said beaming.

"It's about time," Han added.

"And I can't tell you how thrilled we are to hear you two are going to be parents," Leia paused a moment to wipe away a tear of joy. "To family."

They all raised their glasses. "To family."

~~Fin~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's Notes:
> 
> That was the end of the fanfic, but not the end of the story. Mara trains at the Jedi Academy to become a Jedi Knight. It took her a little longer than normal because a certain blue-eyed Jedi Master had a knack for knocking her up. Their first child was named Ben, then there was a son named Bail and a daughter they named Miri.
> 
> Once during a meditative session, Mara had a vision of a group of aliens called the Vong preparing to attack. Because of the advanced notice, the New Republic was able to dissuade the aliens from entering their galaxy without a shot fired (No Vergere, no Jacen turning Sith, no death of Anakin).
> 
> Jacen, Anakin and Jaina grew up to be powerful Jedi. Jacen married Tenel Ka. Together they were able to make changes in the Hapes political system and ended the scourge of backbiting and assassination attempts that once plagued the government. They had five beautiful children.
> 
> Anakin married Tahiri Veila and had seven children. Han would often joke that his son kept his wife barefoot and pregnant—referring, of course, to Tahiri's aversion to footwear.
> 
> Jaina married Jag Fel and together they helped defeat the Killiks, an insect race. The killiks left the galaxy and went back to their original culture in peace and isolation (therefore avoiding any Dark Nest storyline). Together they had four children.
> 
> Callista comes back to try to reestablish a romantic relationship with Luke, but she is killed by a very pissed off Mara. After Callista's death her body morphed into the hideous image of a creature later referred to as Abeloth. Luke was shocked and said to Mara, "How did you know that wasn't really Callista?" Mara responded confused, "That wasn't Callista?"
> 
> So all went well and the galaxy was now at peace.
> 
> Luke and Mara soon found themselves as grandparents and then great grandparents. Years later, at the advanced age of 112, Mara and Luke died peacefully together in bed…after a particularly intense night of bootknocking.
> 
> AND THAT'S THE WAY IT SHOULD HAVE BE WRITTEN IN THE PROFICS!


End file.
